12 Steps: Discussions related to the 12 Steps and using them as a treatment to recover from alcohol and drug addiction.
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Postby Memgal306 » Sun Jul 12, 2009 5:35 pm

HI all. I feel that I am obligated to say HI! I am Kim & I am an alcoholic. Step 4 - YUCK! It is hard to think back to what I was & I really do not want to. I am living day by day sober. I am drinking lots of mtn dew & eating a lot of reeses peanut butter cups. Any advice?

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Postby Dallas » Sun Jul 12, 2009 9:09 pm

Hi Kim! Nice to see you participating!

My suggestions? Learn to like good strong and fresh coffee -- and drink lots of it! I just heard of some med study that it helps prevent memory loss! (Got to have at least 5 big cups a day for it to work)... Sometimes, I think I drink 5 pots a day... so, my memory, I'm sure... is better than an elephants memory! :wink: My brain will never die!

My other suggestion??? Chocolate Truffles! They'll make you feel good... as long as you're not allergic to chocolate!

Hmmm... be sure you take Steps 1, 2 & 3, before 4... and follow up 4, with 5! :wink:

Anything else?


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Postby Memgal306 » Sun Jul 12, 2009 9:52 pm

O yea - got to have my coffee. I drink about 3 cups every morning. Then I either drink mtn dew or iced tea. At first w/ my sobriet I was eating anything within sight. :P It was kinda funny because I was on a liquid diet off & on for a while when i was so overwhelmed w/ burying myself in alcohol....

Back to step 4 - it calls for resentments - my ill moods when I was drinking - :oops: that sucks!

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Postby Dallas » Sun Jul 12, 2009 11:58 pm

The resentments that I had when I was drinking were not the problem for me. It's the resentments that I had while I was sober... those made me mighty thirsty!


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Postby GeoffS » Mon Jul 13, 2009 1:27 am

There is an example Step 4 in the topics down below which may help.

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Postby Danni » Wed Jul 15, 2009 2:36 pm

Hi Kim, welcome to the site. My name is Danni and I'm an alcoholic, too.


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Step Four inventoty - why?

Postby jackjd » Wed Aug 05, 2009 10:40 am

Hi, I'm a newbie...both to the program and to i may mess this up before it's posted or whatever

How is the inventory supposed to help? Sometimes it just seems like "the truth will set you free" and I don't really get it yet what more there is to the reason behind the step

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FEAR drove my life. I was its SLAVE

Postby robbiechaos » Wed Aug 05, 2009 4:05 pm

I just Finished Step 4,5,6 and 7 this week. And although it was hard. No one wants to look at what a sh*t they have been. And step 4 took me at least 10hrs with my sponsor and 20hrs of soul searching and writting on my part. It took me over an hour just to say the resentment prayer for everyone on my resentment list. I can HONESTLY say I was fearless and searching in my inventory. And it showed me things about myself I never would have seen in a thousand years of group therapy. It showed me what I DID. How I CONTRIBUTED TO MY OWN MISERY. How my heartache was almost entirely caused by my selfishness, dishonesty or fear. And how even when I was victimized it showed me the role I had played, how my choices turned me into a victim. Before I did this step, I thought I was fearless, because Id fight any man or beast, because I swim with sharks or jump out of planes. But now I see how FEAR drove my life. How I was its SLAVE. And Now I have a chance to :lol: truely live courageously. I have never felt more free in my life than I feel now. So to all of you out there that are brave enuff to face who you were to become who you want to be. I say find someone to take you through it and JUST DO IT. If you can be fearless and honest for just this one thing. I promise U this. U wont regret it.

God Bless You ALL
Robbie Chaos

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Postby leejosepho » Wed Aug 05, 2009 6:12 pm

Hey, Kim!

I was "in the Fellowship" for a little over two years and had heard all kinds of horrible things about Step Four before I finally found someone who could show me how to actually take it, and almost nothing I had previously heard about it turned out to be true! For example:

"First, we searched out the flaws in our make-up which caused our failure." ("A.A.", the book, page 64)

That does *not* say anything whatsoever about searching out our flaws to see what miserable wretches we had been. No, it only says what it says:

"We searched out the flaws ... which caused our failure."

Having failed at life as I had, and now as part of beginning a new manner of living, doing a little troubleshooting by first discovering my personal defects made complete sense.

However, that is not even where Step Four actually begins! Rather, it begins with a look at mere manifestations or "symptoms" of our flaws, and we are soon given the antidote we need to begin getting over drinking even yet before later on seeing our actual defects.

If you would like to see how exciting Step Four can actually be, I will gladly help you with it, and with precisely this in mind:

"We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free." (page 133)

He did not give us this program to increase or compound our misery!

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Postby ROBERT » Tue Aug 11, 2009 1:33 am

My sponser and I had many laughs during the process...also a lot of positive qualities about myself sick mind had wanted to grab hold of all the bad I had in me and did for years, this process freed me from those chains... :D

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