Thanks for sharing! Listen to your sponsor and stick w/ what's in the Big Book and to hell with what you're hearing in those meetings.
I shared about this subject last night in the meeting that I went to. Yep. I ticked off the old-timers w/ 25 & 30 years that sit around and share some real dumb ideas in meetings. Some old-timers used to screw w/ my head -- telling me "their opinions" instead of "the facts" in the book and I nearly died drunk -- had I continued to listen to them, instead of READ THE BOOK.
They have a harder time trying to control me now, though -- because I'm now considered an old-timer.
Rest insured that "we" are NOT all the same. (Us old-timers).
Some of us really do read the book -- like you're doing -- and we understand what you're going through and what you're saying. We went through the persecutions. And, guess what? We stayed sober while many of them returned to drinking.
There is either a post here in the forum, or a page on the main part of this website -- where I posted a "Big Book Research"... of going through the first 172 pages -- and also Dr. Bob's story, Earl T.'s Story, and Bill D.'s story (he was AA #3) and showed... "how long did they wait before taking ALL the Steps... and how long did it take them... to take ALL of the Steps). From their own stories printed in the First Edition of the Big Book, all the way through the 4th Edition of the Big Book -- it shows that none of them had been sober for more than two weeks before they took the Steps. And, with each of them... the longest it took them was a couple of days. Most of the time... it was done in ONE day.
There is a REASON for that. But, a lot of AA's don't want to hear it. They want to be just like "Jim" in Chapter 3, (around page 35 BB)... who just "Made a beginning." And... that's all he did. Made a beginning! Then, the insanity returned and he got drunk again.
You see... alcoholics a GREAT at making "Beginnings"... starting over, and over and over and over... in SOBRIETY just like they did when they were drinking. They're great starters -- but they don't finish well.
They trust that God is keeping them sober -- without them doing the WORK (the Steps) that God want's US to do.
It's not God's job to take the Steps for me -- that's my job.
It's not God's job to keep me sober -- that's my job, too.
God's job is: To give me DIRECTION on what I HAVE TO DO (the actions that I MUST take)... so that I can stay sober -- AND so that I can be happy, joyous and free -- while sober.
Well. God ALREADY gave me the DIRECTIONS. It's the 12 Steps. It's the Big Book. And, helping other alcoholics. If I TAKE the Steps, read the book and do the work that's in the book -- and help other alcoholics -- in the way, that the book tells me to help them -- then, I'm firmly convinced that I will stay sober. And, my experience has been that I'll be happy while sober.
Here is what I used to ask them, when they'd get on my case...
1. Is alcohol-ism a fatal disease or not?
2. Is alcohol-ism progressive?
3. Why is it -- that when I TRY to "not drink" I INVARIABLY ALWAYS start drinking again?
4. Why can't I just STOP drinking -- after the first drink?
5. Is there a SOLUTION?
6. How long should I wait -- before I take the SOLUTION?
If you're bleeding to death, and bleeding WILL kill you.. (don't think it wont)... and you go to the ER... and sit there for an hour, with others, who are bleeding to death... and at the end of an hour of waiting, you all stand up, hold hands, and say the Lord's Prayer... and then tell each other "Let's go home now and JUST DON'T BLEED! Don't bleed for the next 24 hrs. And, keep coming back to the WAITING room, because it works if you work it!"
How many would leave without getting stitched up first?
Is that what you would do if you were bleeding to death?
Well...???? IS alcohol-ism fatal or is it not?
Don't tell me that it's progressive and it's going to kill me -- and then tell me "don't die too soon now! Keep coming back to the meetings!"