Step 4, Help and Work sheets

12 Steps: Discussions related to the 12 Steps and using them as a treatment to recover from alcohol and drug addiction.
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Step 4, Help and Work sheets

Postby Dallas » Mon Aug 01, 2005 9:25 pm

The 4th Step Worksheets

I’ve been getting a lot of email from people who have lost the link to the Step 4, Work sheets that was posted in our old forum. So, I’ll post it here for those of you looking for it.

These are the same worksheets that I use for the 4th Step Workshops that I conduct.

While my intentions were to provide the work sheets to help alcoholics, I have been told by both, alcoholics and non-alcoholics that the worksheets have helped them.

You will need Acrobat Reader to read and print the worksheets.

Be sure to download all FIVE files if you download or print out the work sheets.

There are FOUR worksheets. Resentments, Fears, Sex Conduct, Harms to others
AND THE INSTRUCTIONS. (five separate files) Be sure to get them all or they may not make sense to you.

Read the instructions page first. If you have questions, contact me either with the contact form on the Step 12 website, or you can contact me directly in the 12 Step Forums.

Also, be sure to read the text on the page before proceeding with the forms.

Here’s the link:

If you have questions, comments or need help with the forms, let me know!


Note # 1

Recently, I received an email from someone who downloaded the 4th Step forms, and evidently, the person and their sponsor became very confused. The persons sponsor told the sponsee... that the 4th Step did not include a list of "Harms Done to Others." The email informed me, that they had spent several hours looking in the Big Book and 12 & 12 and just couldn't find any reference to this list.

If you or your sponsor encounter the same problem, please follow these suggestions:

First, Go to page 59 of the Big Book and read Step 8: “ Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.â€

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Burning Step 4

Postby Spiritman » Thu Dec 29, 2005 9:37 am

Good morning,

Buring Step four in AA is not appropriate, I agree with you 100%!
Buring your inventory is totally unacceptable for me. I refer to my old Step four inventories every time I process Step 4 in my recovery. I compare and contrast my records of self. I look for patterns of succes and lack thereof.

As a counselor, a non AA position, I do ask clients to bury or burn things.
What do I mean as things?
I had a client who lost her daughter in a car accident. She was unable to deal with the situation, and never had a personal funeral for her daughter, just a social one. I asked her to brings some things that were her daughters and a picture. I brought a shovel, she buried the things in a grave she dug and covered, she prayed, and forgived herself and lived a much happier life (yes I cut the story short).
I have also asked people addicted to drugs and alcohol to bury a bottle, can, or drug in a grave too. This is a method that does work for many, yet not everyone, and it is only a small portion of the recovery process.
Recovery here is ot AA style, simply counseling style.
So, why have I even bothered to mention this?
Simple, in my opinion it pays to read the Big Book, especially Chapter 5!
"We turned back to the list..."
"Referring to our list again..."
"...personal inventory..."
Inventory means absolutly nothing unless you compare it to the next inventory, then and only then may you honselty measure the process of restoration-recovery!
Just a few off the cuff tought about this... pay attention to the Big Book.

Peace, Enlighten, Accept, Concentrate, Empower!

The Spiritman

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Miss Spelling: Inventory!

Postby Spiritman » Thu Dec 29, 2005 9:44 am

Buring in my previous post is suppose to be Burning

Typing Relpase,
Self inventory of past expereience and behavior has resulted in a correction in behavior since I had something to compare it to. Mmmm, if I had burned it, I would not be able to ASSESS it for correction.

The Spelling Relapse was corrected by inventory which I could not have done if I had burned the previous list (behavior).

The Spiritman

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Postby Dallas » Thu Dec 29, 2005 11:54 am

Hey Spiritman!

Thanks for sharing your insight on this. I always appreciate learning of the many power tools out there in the Universe that end up in my own little tool kit! For me, it makes getting the job done more efficiently, more thoroughly and much faster.

Keep em' coming!


Rusty Zipper
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Postby Rusty Zipper » Thu Dec 29, 2005 8:39 pm

thanks you two... i remember agonizing over my written fourth... you know the perfect fourth step! lol... but i aint kid'n... how do i do it... BB way, hazelton way, my sponsers way, a friends way... any fk'n way... after a compleat brain fart.... i ran into Mr Wisdom... ha say Patrick, theres realy only one way to do it... " Your Way, its your confessions, no one elses... so as i layed low for a week end... no phones, no tv, no nut'n... cept for some nice L'a Music'a... i grabed a pen and some paper, sat on my bed, in my room in CT. and started writ'n... resentments, then harms done.... when the dust setteled, i went back to see the behaviors asssc. with each thin i put down... Big Book Yikes, was this kid a mess... i stil have those sheets of paper. when i a feel'n a little down, or mabe a bit cock'y. i can go back and look, look at where i was, and where i'm at now... another Mirical... one day att'a... hast'a y'all... xo The Zip :wink:

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4th Step Worksheets

Postby mendomann » Wed Jul 09, 2008 2:36 pm

I got sober in 1979 and at that time I was unaware of 4th step worksheets. How long have these worksheets been around :?:
Last edited by mendomann on Sat Jul 12, 2008 2:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Postby Dallas » Wed Jul 09, 2008 6:44 pm

The basic format of these worksheets have been around, at least since 1985/1986.

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Postby GeoffS » Thu Jul 10, 2008 12:18 am

One thing that I feel is often not emphasised around the 4th step is that it does not have to be perfect. Neither do you have to get it all in ONE HIT. Of course try to be as thorough as possible when you write it then discuss it with your sponsor or spiritual advisor.

However if new things come to mind later, go through it with your sponsor then. Add the amends to the list, or do them when appropriate.

Thorough means thorough as in trying to be complete, not as in one shot and you're done. As long as you address everything some gaps in time are ok. As long as you genuinely don't remember and don't try to cover up something you think of.

And if in doubt as to whether it should be on the list. Get it written down and discuss it with your sponsor anyway.

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Postby Susan » Fri Jul 11, 2008 7:42 pm

Hi Everybody, it is good to be back from retreat and up and running. I had an older sponsor and I did burn my fourth step when I did step five. Here is how it went. My Sponsor wrote my amends list, she wrote my list of character defects, she also wrote down my gifts . The sponsor is suppose to do something too. I did not go to treatment, my insurance did not cover it. She had a list of my stuff and I did. Then I did six and seven and then she told me what TYPE of amends I would be making to the people places and things on my list. There was no donation to some charity, BS! She was tough as nails and I have been sober since. It works for many but the sponsor has a part in it.

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Thanks For All Your Help Dallas

Postby robbiechaos » Wed Aug 05, 2009 4:24 pm

Thanks Dallas Your 4th Step Inventory sheets really helped me and my sponsor. They helped me to focus on the work rather than how I was formatting it. We printed up extra copies so others in our group could benefit from your work. I feel like such a burden has been lifted off me after this 4th and 5th step. And you really helped me JUST DO IT. Thank YOU Dallas

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