Yep. He sounds like the genuine type, don't he?
I've heard some speakers say "I didn't start drinking to become alcoholic!"
I'm sure that most alcoholics probably did not start drinking to become alcoholic -- but, I do remember as a young teen -- one of my goals was to become alcoholic.
Of course, I had no idea what it really meant to be alcoholic. I only knew that my heros were called alcoholics. They were tough. Bad asses. They were real men. They didn't cry and they could withstand anything!
So, I got me a bottle of whiskey, bought me a guitar, and changed my birth certificate that said I was older -- so that I could go get a drivers license. And, I left home at 13 years old.
I didn't have time to be a kid. Life was kind of tough -- and I needed to grow up really fast so that I could survive.
And, whiskey did me good for a bunch of years. It did for me what I couldn't do for myself. And, it was that way up until the last days when my drinking seemed to start turning on me.
For me to give up alcohol was like a normal man giving up his God. Mentally I was hooked. Physically and emotionally I was hooked. And, then to be told that I had developed an abnormal reaction to the thing that was sustaining me -- was like being told that I had developed an abnormal reaction to all foods, water, and breathing!
"How will I ever be able to live without it... let alone act normal or be normal without it?"
For me, drinking seemed like the most normal thing that I had ever done. It felt like my legs had been chopped off -- when I discovered that my only option -- if I wanted to live -- was to let go of the drinking.
For me, it was like letting go of the best relationship that I had ever had in life. As I look back now, I can see that I went through a grieving process about it... besides the crazies and the itching and scratching and things crawling on me and inside me... and the horrible dreams, waking up being so wet that it was like I just stepped out of the shower!
I felt like "you know... if I can make it through the next 24 hours... I'll be able to make it through anything... But, I didn't believe I could make it the 24 hours without a drink.
Thanks to God, and to AA, they were able to do for me -- what I could not do for myself... and today, I'm free... and reasonable happy and sane... without drinking.