Welcome to the forum! Nice to have you here and I hope that you like it enough to keep coming back!
From reading your post, it sounds like you've experienced what most of us experience at some time or other inside or outside of A.A.
We come in contact with people who can be nice on one day and difficult on six days! And, some others who can be nice on one day and difficult for the next 364 days! And, fortunately... we will occasionally run into some that seem to be able to keep it together most of the week and be nice for six days in a row... and then be difficult on the 7th. Once in a while... we'll even cross paths with some real sick SOB's that seem to have nothing good whatsoever in them and they're sick and cantankerous all the time!!
It isn't just an A.A. thing. They're out there in the super markets, gas stations, on the freeways and expressways, at work, at play, sometimes at home with us and sometimes they're living right next door to us!
It seems to me that we get many of them in AA... but, perhaps we have no more or less of them in AA than we have them outside of AA. After all, those people are somewhere else... when they're not in A.A.!
I think it would be wonderful if we had some place that we could go and we wouldn't find those nitwits, goofs and crazy people. Once I tried staying in my house to keep away from then and all was going pretty well and then one of them would knock on my door wanting to borrow something, or sell something, or... delivering some stupid letter that they were making me get up and go sign something to show that I received it! And, another nitwit that would sneak around to the back of my house and turn the water, or gas or electrict off... real jerks about it... and they had the right house number but they were on the wrong street! My bill was paid and they were supposed to be at a house three blocks away! Yet, I was the one getting punished!!!
On another occasion, while I was trying to stay inside my house and away from them... I can't remember what happened... but, something did, and the SOB that was doing me wrong stood there looking at me in the mirror calling me the SOB for staying home!!! Get a load of that? Made me just want to kill him or beat him up, or something!
I used to be able to have a couple of drinks... and those other people would somehow get better for a little while... and I could tolerate them more easily... but, then, damned if I didn't become alcoholic... and then I couldn't drink any more! That really sucked... to have to deal with those nitwits and goofs like they were... and I couldn't have a drink to make it more manageable to be around them! That made me feel like God and life were out to get me!
What could I do? I couldn't escape them... and I couldn't drink!
I found my relief one day when I was reading the Big Book... and life and those people and even myself had become so unbearable... sober... that I just couldn't live with it any longer.
I had thought that everything was supposed to get better... if I just stopped drinking and stayed sober! Gees. I sure was wrong about it in my case. I stopped drinking and my life got worse... and I ran into more of those difficult people!
Why was my experience so different... than the experience of those people in the book? That was my question... and I still couldn't figure it out.
So, I figured that... "Well, maybe I'll try those Steps that I keep reading about and see if that will make any difference!"
And, sure enough... after I got through my Steps the first time, and then kept taking them and practicing them, some of those sick SOBs got better!
But, even then... I was still running into too many of them... and my last resort, because I couldn't drink... was to keep doing what I was doing... and eventually something happened to me that made it easier for me to deal with them.
I still run into those types. And, sometimes it still bothers me. But, now... I know which of the tools and which Steps to apply to the problem to make it easier to deal with.
I hope that helps.
Keep coming back!!! It's great to have you here and I hope that we read much more from you!