- Greetings all. My name is Tracey and I'm an alcoholic...

Greetings all. My name is Tracey and I'm an alcoholic...




Introduce yourself or read introductions from others!

Greetings all. My name is Tracey and I'm an alcoholic...

Postby dancingphoenix » Fri Mar 19, 2010 1:42 am

I was searching for some online AA support and it looks like I came to a good place! :)

I've been reading through some various threads and I'm struck by the love and service I see here. It's really beautiful. That's one thing I always miss in AA meetings is the inability to "cross-talk." I wish people could interact more back and forth in meetings.

I'm almost to my 30 day mark (in a couple days) and find that the cravings are getting pretty intense (as they always do around this time). So when it's night and there are no meetings I thought that reading AA type stuff online might help. :)

I'm 41 years old and a mother of two. It's been an interesting and depressing/scary ride, this alcoholic business, but I do have hope. I don't want to be a drunk anymore. I like myself when I'm sane and not violently ill!

I recently got my first DUI. Like I read from someone else (on the first forum here) I'm hoping that can be my wake-up call. I just can't do the drinking anymore, it's killing me, hurting everyone who loves me and potentially can hurt someone else if I get behind the wheel of a car in a blackout again. I DO NOT want to do this anymore!

So, enough with the long babble! :) I appreciate this forum and look forward to getting to know people here and be able to help others as well as receive help.

Love,

Tracey
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Postby Dallas » Fri Mar 19, 2010 9:40 am

Welcome to the site Tracey! I'm glad you found us -- it might be me that will be the other person that you can help here! :wink:

Congrats on coming up on your 30 days!!! That's great! I remember how tough it was for me to get 30 days... It was so tough that I don't think I could do it again! So, hopefully, you'll keep coming back sober -- and help me to maintain my sobriety -- and then I'll never have to worry about having to start all over again!

So, you're a mom of two? That means you have three huge reasons to stay sober! Your children would have a really difficult time in life -- if you weren't there to be able to help them grow!

If myself, or any of the others here can ever be of service to you -- please let us know. And, when you're up alone late at night... if need be, we can set up a rotating watch, so that one of us will be here in the forum late at night if you need help or support.

Please keep coming back! We really do need you -- and, besides... you'll be glad that you did! :wink:

Best regards,

Dallas
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Postby dancingphoenix » Fri Mar 19, 2010 9:47 am

Thanks for the kind words, Dallas. :)

Yes, the thirty days is hard...and the sixty...etc. :P Oh heck, they are all hard! :D

I've been this route before, but as is common of course, this one is the worst. I'm thankful to have found these forums as just reading the threads, even if I don't post, helps me get back to a better mindset if I feel iffy.

I'd LOVE to help you stay sober!! :) I totally get that helping others gets you out of yourself and in a loving, giving mindset. It keeps you healthier, and besides, it's just GOOD to give to others anyway!

But with all that said, you still have to freaking take the craving, the fear, the depression/anxiety/panic and just DEAL with it. Without a drink. It's so hard...ugh.

One day at a time...one moment at a time. And as many meetings as I can squeeze in while I still have a drivers license to get to them. :P After that it's bike time! :P

Thanks for the love. Have a wonderful day! :)
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Location: Vallejo, CA

Postby Dallas » Sat Mar 20, 2010 12:21 pm

Thank you, Tracey!

I referred to my first 30 days as "The Thirsty Thirdy!" :lol:

After you go through the 12 Steps... it will be SO much easier and continue to get better and better and better and better!

Hang in there. Do the work that only you can do. I look forward to skipping hand-in-hand with you, down the Sober Road of Happy Destiny!

Dallas
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Postby dancingphoenix » Sat Mar 20, 2010 2:43 pm

Ha!!! I like that, the Thirsty Thirdy! :P Funny, hehe. True, too. I'd like it to be my LAST Thirsty thirty. :P

I like to skip! Let's do it!!! :D

I will definitely be posting quite a bit to these forums.

I've learned that reading/hearing other people's stories helps me beyond measure and I'm looking forward to sharing my own to help others as well.

<3

Tracey
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Location: Vallejo, CA

Postby Dallas » Sat Mar 20, 2010 11:43 pm

Reading and/or hearing from you will be helping us beyond measure, too!

I'm excited for you Tracey! I've watched ladies that come in from out in the cold... and they grab hold of AA, the Big Book, the 12 Steps, and they not only transform and recreate their own lives -- but, they become legendary as a result of the impact that they have on helping others to recreate their lives, too! It's just so awesome to watch them. One day they are like a little plant that springs up. They get nourished... and a little while later they've turned into a stem with a bulb on it... a little while longer, and we're commenting on what a beautiful flower they've blossomed into... and before you know it... they've turned an entire weed patch into a wonderful and beautiful garden!!!

We are never so far down -- that we can't move up to the top!

Dallas
Last edited by Dallas on Sun Mar 21, 2010 2:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby dancingphoenix » Sun Mar 21, 2010 1:44 pm

Yay, I'm a plant!! :D *chortle*

Yes, I agree, we are never so far down that you can't start to go up. Sometimes, that's the only direction you CAN go. I'd not gotten so far down that there wasn't still plenty of room for downwards maneuvering, but I've gotten as far down as I'm willing to go. :P

<3

I'll be posting frequently, but for this week my kids are down visiting, so I will be scarce. :D YAY KIDS!!!!! Wait...should I be yay-ing when I now have a house full of teenagers...hrm...AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!
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Postby Dallas » Sun Mar 21, 2010 2:53 pm

Have a great sober time enjoying your kids Tracey! :wink:

If one of them gets you nerved up -- just log in here and kick and yell and scream -- or laugh... whatever you do -- we'll join with you! :wink:

I had to correct a spelling above: I wrote "they become a steam" instead of "a stem" (I think that's the way to spell stem). :lol:

Some do "steam"... (cause they get so hot!) but I really did mean stem!

Gee, now I'm imagining the difference between a steamy garden and a stemmy one! :lol: :lol:

Hurry back! We'll be missing you!

Dallas
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Postby ccs » Sun Mar 21, 2010 7:04 pm

Hi Tracey

:D :D :D WELCOME :D :D :D

nice to meet you and you are absolutly correct you did find a great place here my name is Cessie and I`m an alcoholic and you are helping me already I thank you :D its wonderful about your 30th day coming up and its awesome to know that I`m getting another Sister in sobriety!!!!

I cant wait to get to know you and watch you grow!! so Please do keep coming back cause we need you !!! thanks for sharing with us Luv Cessie

I think we all should give Dallas a little help with his STEAMY garden and see what we can grow together that we couldn`t grow alone :lol:
LUV U D!!!!!!!

Luv-Hugs-2- all CESS
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Postby MagicHappened » Mon May 03, 2010 7:20 pm

Hi Tracey,

I'm new here as well. I attend a meeting almost every day and still feel like I can't absorb enough to fill the hole that alcohol used to (attempt to)...so I am glad I found this site.

I hope by now you are celebrating even more days sober!! I remember each chip I took, I had this sense of accomplishment. Then, almost immediately after taking the chip, a sense of sadness...realizing...oh my gosh...this is my LIFE!(?)

It is a bitter sweet realization that I have come to see is only relieved when I am actively reading the BB and working the steps. Getting OUT of my head.

Wishing you beautiful days ahead. You are not the only one having to get creative to get to meetings.

:wink:
KISS
Last edited by MagicHappened on Tue May 04, 2010 11:25 am, edited 1 time in total.
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