Hello Travis. Welcome to the site! I understand. The reason you feel like you're starting all over again is -- because you are.
Been there and did that, too. That's why I understand. You made it a lot further along that I did, though. So, congrats! I only had 5 1/2 months when the insanity kicked back in -- and I, too, started with only a sip of beer. What's odd to me -- is that I didn't even realize I had the sip. The person I bought the beer for me had to tell me about it.
Then, I progressed to coffee... Mexican version... with Kahlua and tequila in it... with whipped cream, nutmeg and a cherry!
I bought her six of those for breakfast... but she didn't like coffee... so I drank them for her. I still considered myself as sober... because I had not taken MY first drink yet... it was HER drinks... so, naturally, the alcohol belonged to her! As far as I was concerned... I was still a sober member of AA!!
What can I say? Step 2 says I'm nuts... I finally came to understand and believe it!
If you relate to any of this -- we might conclude... that, Congratulations! You've just started taking the Steps!
I do wish you better than me. I struggled in and out of meetings, mostly drunk, for four months after my new adventures. Four months of starting over day after day after day after day after day!!! And, with all my trying and with all of AA's help -- I couldn't even get one day sober!!!!
On November 14th, 1986... at 2:47 pm... on an overcast southern California Friday afternoon... something happened, that started me on another adventure in sobriety and I've been sober ever since!!! Not meant as bragging, though. I understand the nature of my alcoholism now -- and that means, that I understand, that I could be the next sober alcoholic in AA... that has the experiment with the next first drink!!!
Thanks for coming here and sharing your experience with us... you've helped me, today!!! And, I appreciate you and I'm grateful for you. I hope you keep coming back!