My name's Anne, I'm an alcoholic,
Welcome to Cheryl, & to Phoenix
..slips..I've had a few...then again..too few to mention..
okay, so that was bad...one thing that was suggested to me was that I had to find a 'better' way of treatin' myself. If I was accustomed to "treatin' ' myself w/ a drink ( I worked hard...customer's were somethin' else, 'specially that one--I was a waitress, too...or had a spectacular day, look at the $$tips...I can afford to go out--I'll just have 1 or 2...to relax, unwind)...it was suggested that I think back & recall somethin' else that also relaxed me...what'd I like? Some suggested that if I liked scented candles, take that same $$, go buy a couple, bubble bath--whatever...& pamper myself-be good to yourself. My body was literally yellow jello, inside & out, if it was my bag-a-tea, make an appointment for a facial, a haircut...go out & buy that cd I always wanted but could never afford-cuz I was spendin' $$ on booze. Another thing that would hang me up...those I worked w/ would have plans to 'go out after work' (this was years before AA, when all I thought was I just needed to stop, or cut back, or whatever...swear off it, then be back at a table again wonderin' how&why)..my resolve would be instantly erased w/ only a few words: wanna come w/ us? Although I don't recommend that ya quit yir job--need that...I did eventually discover though that waitressing wasn't a job that I should be doing. It took a lot for people to rattle me, & for the most part--most didn't, but-all it takes is that one who orders chocolate milk, then rips on ya, askin' why ya brought him that & why would he
. There are those who believe that because you are their waitress, you are therefore their 'servant', & treat ya that way & get really ugly & aren't satisfied til they got 'cha--literally.
I learned to ask myself the question: how good is this for my sobriety? First, though, I had to ask myself: what do I really want? How do I see myself 10 years from now if I continue to drink--is that the picture I want?
Tap 'er cool, kids, & easy does it. If you're here & ya keep comin' back-perhaps despite your own will--might just be somethin' to that.
You's in the right place.