Kenny - I'm an alcoholic

[Finally]

This is my first time onto this site and ironically felt most comfortable coming to the introduction room to post my first message. I'm not too sure on what to say here other than I'm clean and sober today and have been this way for 53 days. I have my ups and downs but don't we all. I currently reside in a treatment centre and things couldn't be better.. That was actually a little difficult for me to say considering I was so concerned about the material possessions which I don't have today. But again, I'm clean and sober and things couldn't be better. In the Big Book and the 12x12 there seems to be the predominant theme of a willingness and being entirely ready to improve in one way or another and I have both. I know that my only priority in this life is being sober and the rest will fall into place with the grace of my higher power. I be the honest, caring, compassionate person my higher power wants me to be and good things will come.. I believe that.

Thank you all for my sobriety today...

[musicmode]

Hi Kenny

My name is Anne , I'm an alcoholic,

A big hoo-rah!! 53 days! Way-ta-go baby. Don't worry none 'bout those material things...we's get blessed 10-fold & then some if we just keep comin' 'round & doin' what we's s'posed to do. Things are replaceable...we ain't. Sounds like ya's in a good place. Watch yir back fir that 'treatment hi'...it's like the honeymoon phase, y'know? Keep yir tools close...the program, sober&clean people...that 1000 pound telephone--use it...&keep God as you understand Him close,...on yir way out, say hi to someone who's just come in, assure 'em they's on the right track.

Keep it simple,
Anne M.

[Dallas]

Hello Kenny, welcome to the site!

Congrats on your sobriety!

One of the other predominant themes seems to be action.

There were many things that I wasn't willing to do... and sometimes grudgingly... I just went ahead and did them anyway.

Even now, there are times when I'm not very willing to do something... but, even when I'm unwilling... I just go ahead and do them anyway.

So far... it seems to be paying off pretty well for me, as long as I do certain things regardless if I'm willing or not.

For me... sobriety and the good life is not so much a gift from God, as it is a hard won achievement with the help of tools provided by God.

Glad you're here. I look forward to reading your shares.

And... Hey Anne!!! Thank you for sharing, too!

I've been reading and enjoying your messages... I just haven't had much time to reply or comment.

Keep on posting, though!!! I really enjoy (and, I'm sure that many others also enjoy) reading what you share!

Dallas

[Finally]

Thank you both for being so welcoming. It's always nice to maintain a connection even with those you cannot see or have never met. That's the comforting aspect for me about the AA program.. I am reminded of a meeting I went to some time back and there were candles lit and the lights were down. I thought "what a brilliant idea!" because I felt so calm and at peace. As people started to share I noticed that because I couldn't really see their faces I wasn't taking their inventory as I normally have a bad habit of doing and rather I was listening to their voice and the message that they were putting across.

I was paranoid of leaving the sanctity of my treatment centre.. The eutopic bubble where nothing could harm me. And one of the alumni would tell me "one day at a time kenny".. That was a huge problem for me as well even though I had just came out of the meeting that discusses the 24 hours a day book! I thought.. "Fine.. so what can I do about my fear TODAY?" I went out and got myself an out of house sponsor and that's the best thing I could have done to maintain that relationship with the house even when I'm not in it. I am in the middle of doing my step 4 and it's pure insanity.. as all alcoholics can relate to. I had first told my sponsor that I only thought I had 3 names to write on my resentments.. He said "get honest with yourself because there's no way that's possible". Once I searched deep I was able to come up with 87 names on my list and have completed the resentments portion of that just yesterday. It was a relief but man was i ever stressed out from reliving each situation in my head.

I'm clean today and am still on a roll..

Thank you all for my sobriety.