Good morning Molly!
As I was re-reading the messages that I posted here I had this great fear rip through me about "Gees. I hope that Molly didn't think I was suggesting that it would be a good idea for her to ask herself the question that I always ask myself!" I was just trying to imagine myself as having a tough decision like yours... and what I might have to do if I were faced with my own tough decision like yours.
From reading your messages I can see that you've done a really great job of making a lot of great and successful accomplishments in your life which I'm sure are the results of making some very sound and mature and responsible decisions. I admire what you've been able to accomplish! And, I thank you for the opportunity for me to learn something about me -- through you sharing your experience, strength and hope with your situation.
When I do my own "what would a mature adult do" routine... often, I've noticed that my first time around the question... will produce a "should do" rather than a "would do". I get those two concepts mixed up and that's probably one of the reasons that I have to use this routine on myself so often.
Most often, my "should do" answers are coming from old perceptions that were developed around a lot of my errors in thinking. I discovered that I had a bunch of perceptions about "Roles"... and, that most often in life, I was spending a whole bunch of time trying to figure out what "Role" I was supposed to be playing... as if life were a big stage, and the spotlight was on me, and I was supposed to perform perfectly in a Role that I had no training and no business playing!
And, my Role concepts... might work great in a half-hour Hollywood movie... but, my perceptions were unrealistic about living life in the reality zone.
My "absolute ideas" that I still work on letting go: My "should do" perceptions have always been a big problem for me. My "should do" is often based on my unrealistic expectations -- of myself -- or others. And, my "absolute ideas".... those are from my old days of thinking "there is only one right answer - there is only one right way - and I've got to be right."
Yesterday, I got a fortune cookie, and the fortune read: "It is better to be wise than it is to be right."
It reminded me of a saying around A.A. that has helped me a lot... "Would you rather be happy... or right?"
So, for me... "What would a mature adult do in my life today?" 1. Stay sober. 2. Don't get too serious about myself. God's world and all the creatures in it will do just fine with or without me. 3. Try to do a little bit better today than I did yesterday. 4. Keep an open mind. 5. Choose to be happy... and try to be wise about it!
Have a wonderful day!!!!