by Bob1975 » Sun Apr 15, 2007 2:28 pm
My name is Bob, I will August 15 (2007) have 19 years continuos sobriety. I have not picked up. My emotional sobriety is another thing. I still need meetings, still have to do it 24 hours at a time. I still have the the daily reprieve contingent on my spiritual maintanence. I was exposed to AA in 1977 in the Navy. Six years later I hit a bottom where if AA did not work, I was going to hang it up totally (suicide). I felt so incredibly horrible, depressed, completely alone. Not by my self I mean I saw a VA phycologist once a week and my lahdlord for ten minutes a week to pay rent on my room. And that is the only time I talked to anyone. If AA didn't work work I did not have much left. Fortunately terrified I kept going to meetings they told me it would get better. 30 years later. 19 years continuos sobriety later. I don't have days like that any more. Thank God. Alcohol kicked my butt, tore it up. I dug a pretty deep one so it was a while after I stopped digging to come back. But for the grace of God today life is pleasant, challenging, difficult, hard, fun, humbling, excetra. I do not feel enraged or terrified anymore. There is love justice and hope in the world today. And the world makes sence, as it says in the big book, I need to not concetrate so much, not on what needs to be changed in the world as what needs to be changed in me. Through my higher power, and that (whatever) bigger than me, I'm sober today. Thanks for letting me share that with you. I'm glad the site is here, thank you. Bob1975
Now, I'm off to enjoy a good, safe, sane and sober lunch! I can do that today, because of all that I've received in AA!