TinaL wrote: I am still having a hard time with turning everything over...
Here's something to help you keep it simple. Think of the third step in a single word: "CONSENT".
"Surrender" is OK, but it kinda has the notion of a struggle or a fight. Also, today I can surrender because I have something to surrender. I have "things" and "assets" along with my will and my life. When Japan and Germany "surrendered" to the Allies, they had people, places, and things leftover that were not destroyed by the war. There were assets left that were useful.
Not so for me when I hit bottom. I didn't have anything like "assets" to surrender. I didn't have anything that God could find useful, except for my arms and legs. Never mind this head that holds the "broken thinker" (like yours) - a useless piece of nearly destroyed merchandise - that was back then. But its all been transformed now.
When I first did the 3rd step, I was insane from the damage of alcohol, and I was incompetent - I could not manage even simple things from my life's affairs. I needed a "CARETAKER". I heard and watched how turning to God changed things for the better. So I became CONVINCED that God, whoever that was, would be a good enough "caretaker" for me at least for a while. So when I'm in that kind of physical, emotional, and spiritual mess, there's not much to fight about or surrender.
I could only CONSENT just like someone insane, disabled, or incompetent CONSENTS when they need someone to take care of their life's affairs. Saying that 3rd step prayer for the first time was just like "signing on the dotted line". It was my contract with God as I understood Him. All I could do was agree or "consent" to Him and let Him begin by taking care of me and my life's affairs. As I recovered, He thought enough of me to let me join the ranks of his "Company". Like the book says, "we found a new Employer". He's the Director and we're His agents.
DebbieV wrote:To me that made a little more since in this hard head of mine, I hope it will help you also.
Hope you dont mind Paul!! I passed it on for ya.
Hang in there, somedays are better than others.
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