- A New Freedom

A New Freedom




Alcoholics and Addicts sharing their personal recovery story with us to help others who want to recover.

A New Freedom

Postby DebbieV » Wed Jul 29, 2009 5:14 pm

Getting sober is why I am here today..

I learned a while back in AA that I wanted more in my life than to be just "here". I wanted to be happy, at peace, comfortable in my decisions, a good mom, maybe a wife, free from pain, what others could see in me but I could not see in myself.

I lived so much of my life feeling like I was not worthy of happiness, not the kind I saw in "others" around me. I cut myself on a regular basis knowing it was all I deserved and if I died from it then that had to be better than living a drunk, miserable life. I hated myself and had so much slef-pitty that I could not see a future in my life, I didn't think I would be alive long enough to plan one.

Doing the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous is why I have the life I do today.

I was on the computer today trying to decide what to do for a honeymoon and I saw this package to Disneyland. I knew immediately I wanted to get married on the beach with my son there and spend a few days with him in Disneyland. Now the shocking thing is not only that I am getting married :shock: , but I want to take my son to Disneyland, and I can. That is one of the things the "other" people in the world did. Take their kids on trips to Disneyland... I couldn't take him to McDonald's when I was drinking.

A few days ago My fiancee and I decided to go pick some wild flowers. We got the dog and jumped in the Blazer and took off the whole 30 minutes we needed to go to be up in the mountains (12,000 ft mountains) and let the dog out to play in the stream. On the way back I am sitting in the truck, Marc is driving and Bella (the pup) is in the back seat all wet and I closed my eyes and thanked God for helping me get and stay sober. That was a picture I saw that "other" people had, not this pitiful drunk. It was just a normal day in the life I have now.

I started a meeting in town on Saturday night. This last Saturday I got to tell two newcomers how the steps saved my life. How important this program is to me. That getting the right sponsor is a gift we should all experience.
I was told that night that one of the newcomers looked at me as one of the "others". That he didn't see himself capable of having the success and happiness that I had in my life.
I said "I understand" and I spent some time telling him how I was and how the steps had changed my life and if he had enough living a miserable life he could do the steps and start to experience the promises of Alcoholics Anonymous. Just like my sponsor had told me (Thank you D) and never in my wildest dreams did I think I would betting sitting there telling someone the same thing, with the knowledge and experience to know that it is true.

God has blessed me, and thanks to the steps I was able to find him to let him. :D

Thanks for letting me share.

Debbie
DebbieV
 
Posts: 213
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2007 12:22 pm
Location: Silverton, Co

Postby Dallas » Wed Jul 29, 2009 7:08 pm

Thanks for sharing that awesome story of your REALITY Debbie!!!

AA provides us with the tools and the design for living that we need... to turn our dreams into reality!

It's THE WORK. Never forget that!

What came first?
a. sobriety.
b. 12 steps.
c. working with others.

What came next?

A re-created life for you.......... while you were focused on trying to help someone else... like when you started that Saturday night meeting!

That meeting puts fish in your sobriety pond... to make fishing for guppies easier than trolling the bars looking for them!

Keep it up!

Dallas
Dallas
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Postby garden variety » Fri Jul 31, 2009 1:31 pm

Heya DebbieV,

I remember too, when you first started, and your relapse. And your journey back.

What a life you have today. Beautiful story. Disneyworld, your son, and your fiance' - you're helping me see my own dream, too, with my loved one and her son! Breathtaking!

In your wildest dreams back then, could you ever have envisioned the life you now live, one day at a time? Awesome - totally awesome!

I'm also very proud of you, Debbie. And I know that God will always bless your sponsor too!

With all love and respect,
Paul
garden variety
 
Posts: 750
Joined: Fri Aug 04, 2006 7:39 pm
Location: Ohio

Postby DebbieV » Sat Aug 01, 2009 12:18 am

Thank you Paul.
That means so much to me coming from you. I have admired you for the help you have given me and others on here.


Debbie
DebbieV
 
Posts: 213
Joined: Thu Jun 21, 2007 12:22 pm
Location: Silverton, Co


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