New news presented by my Relapse Prevention facilitator. I haven't veracified it yet, but it's good news to me.
It appears that medical researchers have agreed that the gene that causes the propensity for alcoholism has been identified.
Still no excuse. It has absolutely nothing to do with my responsibility for the damage I've done to myself and others or my part cleaning up my side of the street. I am still a self-seeking dufus. It's certainly no excuse for my behavior.
It has long been agreed, based on statistical data, that alcoholism has genetic probabilities so convincing that the AMA and even insurance companies had accepted it as a primary disease. But they lacked the imperical data to support it.
That information helps helps me with one of the most difficult and most important things I need to do to stay sober ... forgive myself.
If I can't forgive myself, I cannot believe that HP can forgive me and I can't accept that anyone else can even though they say so.
Now I can remember the past without regret. That's a biggy to me. I have to remember. But, if I live in regret, I can't move toward those wonderful promises. I can forgive myself and know that HP has forgiven me.
I still have to earn the trust of people around me knowing that I DID THAT CRAP. They don't need to know that I couldn't help it. That knowledge is for me. Thay don't need to know that "I'm supposed to appologize because a book says so". That stuff waters down my sincere remorse to them.
But that's just me.
I hope that helps someone else who struggles with faith and forgiveness.
Love,
Tim-one
Thank God I'm an alcoholic!
| ||||||