On the basis of self-knowledge, can I stay sober?

[twilight2dawn]

I am a newcomer that has come to recognize the reality that WE alcoholics cannot intectualize ourselves into sobriety. I have read MANY books on spirituality, the power of intention, how to create your own reality, how to reprogram your subconscious...(ref: Dr. Bruce Lipton, Lynn McTaggert, Dr. Wayne Dyer, etc).

I finally came to the realization, and it did not happen in one day or one week, that the program of AA is a program for making changes in our lives that will enable US to change OUR perceptions of reality so that WE can live OUR lives on a higher plane, sober and in the service of something more important than OURSELVES, with the help of a power higher than ourselves, since we obviously have failed miserably in the past on our own.

I found it impossible to get there without another loving human being that was willing to walk me through the steps (believe me, I was skeptical of the effectiveness of this endeavor in the beginning). But it is working for me, for which I will always have an enormous amount of gratitude!) You just have to DO IT!

My hope is that you newcomers out there will search out someone to sponsor you to help you through the steps. "AA is a self-help program, but you can't do it by yourself." No one can decide, but you, that you want to go to whatever lengths necessary to become sober.

[GeoffS]

Look at the first word of the first step.

Says it all.

[tim-one]

Thanks, Dawn-o'the-day,

Outa the mouths of babes ... Remarkable to think it's not all for ME, huh?

It occurred to me lately that, when it was all for me, I gained for myself because there were people around me who were willing to give for my benefit. So I kept asking. It worked for a long time ... TOO LONG!

Why shouldn't I become one-o'them givers and let somebody else be needy ME for a change? Nice change.

In AA, I found a whole bunch of people who were trying to give - looking for people who need. In a strange turn of events, it also occurred to me that sometimes I SHOULD be the one in need. I found myself steeling someone else's joy of giving trying to be the biggest giver. Not humble of me. Selfishly unselfish. Ya think?

Why should I have all the joy? HHmmmmm ... can I look for ways to "need" something when I see someone needing to give? Can I suck up my pride enough to let somebody else experience the joy of giving? Isn't that giving, too?

I found another joy as well as humility being able to ask for help when I could use it. Indavertantly, I'm also taking care of arrogant self-sufficiency that was one of the things that kept me drinking, kept me from admitting I needed help to stop drinking far too long.

Kindofa catch 22 for me. Amazing to find balance between need and surplus. It can only a God thing. I ain't that smart to balance that kind of thing. I just happens.

"There is a time for every purpose under heaven."

In AA, it can also be giving to receive. What's different? My attitude and purpose. Sure, I can do it myself. But I don't have to any more. I'll just watch HP's grace through someone else right now. What a joy! I can be the needy one on purpose. HP's grace is sufficient for me.

I love being around people who are all trying to be saints. I'm just claiming progress these days. Gotta let somebody else be the saint sometimes. It's a joy to watch.

Love y'all,
Tim1

PS: Thanks for making me think today. Helped my humbility.