Great responses guys and gals, thanks.
Secondly I have shifted my priorties. Nothing in life is more important than my sobritey. Not my kid, wife, job, friends. Nothing. If I loose my sobriety all the others will go. When I make sobriety my priority those other things just happen to work out.
Yes, this is what I need to get my head around. I know that if I focus on that my quality of life will improve. I guess resentment wise, when my quality of life picks up that will fade as i will be to busy with fulfilling activities that it hopefully wont bother me.
I have been thinking alot about it all the last few day, dipping in and out of the big book and I have realised that although I have had sober months...8 months and 6 months i have never been fully committed and dare i say it quite nonchalant about it. I have realised that i simply MUST take this very seriously. I am not quite as complacent about it all, I have now after a few attempts realized that no it is not any easy path.
This is ok, just a shock ha ha.
Here's to 100% Hoorah!!