- Am I ready?

Am I ready?




Help for alcohol abuse addiction alcoholics who want to stay sober

Am I ready?

Postby jujulynn » Sat Sep 19, 2009 6:23 am

Oh my - that really is discouraging, I must say!

Between that and my husband back on his internet spam site... what the $%!# is a girl supposed to do to keep motivated anyway?

Pizza and martini vs. Salmon & veggies and water???? Bad day coming
jujulynn
 
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Location: Virginia

Postby DebbieV » Sat Sep 19, 2009 10:14 am

Hey JuJu,

I'm going to go out on a limb here and try to read Dallas's mind. I think what he is saying is that he couldn't get sober for God. I know I couldn't. I had a husband and two children I couldn't get sober for. I had a house, car, career, stocks, bonds, trailers, boats, all the materialistic things in the world and I couldn't get sober to keep them. I could not get sober for anyone but me. And today I can't stay sober for anyone but me. I stay sober today WITH God's help but not FOR God. Maybe that sounds like splitting hairs but it is so important to me to always remember that when life got bad enough drinking, when I hated myself enough, when I wanted to end it all, the only way I could get better was to do it for me and no one else. I had to get up and take myself to a meeting, get a sponsor and work the steps as they are outlined in the Big Book....

You have a lot of people who care about you here. We may not know you as a person but we know the disease of Alcoholism and we know what we did and do every day to help ourselves live a happy normal life, and what we want most in the world is to try to help you and others like you live the same way, We know you can do it because we did it and we saw others around us do it. Now it is up to you to take the steps to a better life, however you do not have to walk that walk alone.

I don't know about you but when I eat salmon, veggies and water, I don't feel like killing myself, or end up in jail, or hurt the ones I love. I do when I have pizza and martinis. I'm thinking that pizza and a big glass of ice tea sounds better than any of it.

Hang in there, I know you think no one understands how you feel or what you are going through, but I have been a lot of the same places and I made it through to the other side, just for today.

Debbie
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Am I ready?

Postby jujulynn » Sat Sep 19, 2009 1:40 pm


Thanks for the encouragement and perspective. I don't think I was thinking that I wanted to do it FOR God, but I am asking Him to make me willing to give up the burden of it to Him and ask Him to take me over this mountain.
jujulynn
 
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Location: Virginia

Postby Dallas » Sat Sep 19, 2009 2:39 pm

One day, when I was asking God for help -- I had an awakening. And, it was almost like I could hear Him say to me: "Put down the damn shovel, and pick up the other tools that I gave you -- get up off your butt and your knees, stop sniveling and get your butt to work. And, stop asking Me to do for you what only you can do for you! I won't do it. Period."

Dallas
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Re: Am I ready?

Postby GeoffS » Sat Sep 19, 2009 9:18 pm

jujulynn wrote:
Thanks for the encouragement and perspective. I don't think I was thinking that I wanted to do it FOR God, but I am asking Him to make me willing to give up the burden of it to Him and ask Him to take me over this mountain.


As Dallas has alluded, you might find god gives you some tools and takes you right through the middle of a mountain (of hard work). But if you are willing, take direction from god, learn how to use the tools (from god, the Big Book, a home group and a sponsor). Then you'll dig that tunnel and come out the other side and be happy and able to show others how to dig.
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Am I ready?

Postby jujulynn » Sun Sep 20, 2009 6:07 am

I am sniveling every now and then and trying to self-manage my situation. We live in a remote location so daily meetings are not possible. Between that and a huge commute to/from work, my laptop is my lifeline to the outside world.

I'm also a true football widow, so I spend an obscene amount of time alone. The rest of my family lives 3,000 miles away. Isolation is a factor in my state of mind.

I came here so that I could find someone to chat with so I don't feel so alone.
jujulynn
 
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Location: Virginia

Postby Dallas » Sun Sep 20, 2009 7:35 am

jujulynn wrote:I am sniveling every now and then and trying to self-manage my situation.


You're not alone. I think we can all identify with that. :wink:

I understand living in remote places. There are only 100,000 people in the area where I live. It sucks. :lol:

I once lived in a town with only 300 people. And, that was alright -- because I was still drinking and my head gave me a lot of company.

That little town of 300, was the second place and second time that I heard of AA. I was drunk in a laundramat -- at 3 am in the morning watching the dryers go around. When I got up to put another quarter in the dryer -- I went back to my seat and discovered that someone snuck in and put on the seat of my chair, one of those little yellow cards with the "20 Questions to help you decide if your alcoholic"

I read it and considered it was some religious nut and fanatic that did it -- trying to spread propaganda that no one should drink alcohol. :lol:

Later that morning -- I discovered that this happened on the day of Bill Wilson, Founder of AA's death. I read about him that day in the newspaper and got upset that they would put his name and picture on the front page of the newspaper -- when his desire was to be Anonymous. :wink:

Little did I know -- that some caring lonely AA member, in a little logging town of 300, was attempting to pass on a 12th Step message of hope and awareness to me.

I know a lady, that used to live in the small town that I live in now, that moved up to Colorado, to a little town with about 300 people in it (when tourist season isn't going on). There was one unannounced meeting in town with one member that went to it. So, she took it on herself to get active -- trying to help other alcoholics like me... and started a busy little pocket of AA enthusiasm in the town.

She too, only had a pc and a cell-phone connection to other sober members of AA, and she came to this site as often as she could for encouragement and Fellowship. It worked for her.

I, too, come here for Fellowship and companionship. And, I get inspired and encouraged when you (jujulynn) and others... come here, too.

You end up helping me, and inspiring me and encouraging me. And, if the world works, the way I think it does... and I do believe that it does... what you're passing on to me, will return to you, a hundred-fold. :wink:

The returns may not come from me, and they may not come from here. Who knows, where they will come from? But, they will come.

I hope you stick around with us. It may be of help to you, and I'm sure, that you're sticking around here -- will be a great help to us, and others like us!

Best wishes. And, I hope you keep coming back.

Dallas
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Postby DiggerinVA » Sun Sep 20, 2009 9:56 am

What type of Chat software do you have? None is listed in your profile. I have YahooIM. I will open it and keep it open. I will be around the house today.

Now I understand remote too. I also know a bit about the lay out of the State of VA. My mother is from Woodlawn (near Galax).

I also know a thing or two about isolation. Not enough room to explain here. It can become drivel.

Check you PM and we can arrange a time.
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Am I ready?

Postby jujulynn » Thu Sep 24, 2009 3:47 am


Running like crazy at work and so exhausted all I want to do is sleep when I get home may be a good thing. I don't have any time for anything. (notice the local time?)

I WILL keep coming back - the support and understanding are so very nice. Thank you everyone!
jujulynn
 
Posts: 10
Joined: Sun Sep 06, 2009 2:11 pm
Location: Virginia

Postby DiggerinVA » Thu Sep 24, 2009 5:34 am

;-)
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