Getting in my Higher Powers Way

[RichC]

As I have mentioned before I am very good at getting in my as well as my Higher Powers way.
I have been dragged into a situation where an alcoholic is (which is evident by his actions) pursuing myself and family members across the internet making false and malicious claims.
The details are not important to my question and I wont mention them.
My question is how do I deal with such a person?
If I turn my will over then things tend to escalate and he just antagonizes even worse spreading false claims.
I have managed for the most part to ignore this person but to be honest I have lost control on occasion too.
Generally this just made matters worse and the harassment got worse.
He thrives on the attention and has become a major trigger to me.
I must admit I am impatient for my HP to work his mysterious ways.
And that gets me once again in the way.
I think you get the picture.
Does anyone have any suggestions or comments to help me stay out of the way?
Or suggestions to deal with how to deal with a fellow alcoholic?
Or even more important how to deal with me?

[Dallas]

Hi Rich. I understand. I've been going through it for the last 23 1/2 years ... sober... so, one thing for sure that I can report is: I've been able to stay sober through it -- and if I can do it -- so can you and others.

I don't have any "easy way" suggestions. Never found any easier softer ways to deal with it. Sure, I can, and sometimes do, think "Ok. We all get back what we put out -- so, eventually... Life will dish it back to them in spades." And, sometimes, that's the only thing I can safely do -- to deal with it.

What someone else does or says doesn't define me -- only I can define me. I learned that from "Only an alcoholic can pronounce one as an alcoholic."

But, still... for me, that gives me little consolation.

Spiritually -- I guess I'm supposed to be in a place where I've "ceased fighting anything and everyone." That sounds good -- and it is good -- when I'm spiritually fit enough to be that way!

Sometimes... I resort to some wishful thinking of: "I can't do much about it -- and I'll let God take care of it." -- even when I have thoughts that "God doesn't give a crap about this stuff!"

So, what to do?

Sometimes -- I go after them. Sometimes, I feel like "God gave me a brain to use and doesn't expect me to crawl before anyone or anything." Then, I'll rationalize with a little "self-defense theory" to justify what my next moves will be. And, I make the moves.

Hopefully, we'll have some others here that can give us both some good suggestions on this -- folks that have a more sane and humane way of dealing with it than I do.

Sometimes -- when I go after them -- I start to enjoy it, too much! Some people seem to only understand one thing -- and that's force and actions that get reversed on them. They only understand "If I screw w/ that guy -- I don't want to take the punishment that he'll return!"

One of my rationalization theories has been "Ok. Maybe if I go after someone else's enemies -- and help them -- Life will end up sending someone to punish my enemies."

Your situation may be serious enough, in the way of, where it would be a good idea for you to see a lawyer. Like I said, I wish I had better answers to share.

Whatever the case -- you'd do better to get some answers or suggestions from someone that has had "more of their sanity restored" than me -- when it comes to things like this.

Let me know what you do so that I can try it, too. And, let me know -- if you'd like some company in going after them! I enjoy lashing and punishing the evil doers that "have it coming to them!"

Dallas

[Dallas]

Note: What "has worked for me"... is "time." Waiting it out w/ the thought of -- Ok... I'll get to them... but, I'll do it on my time and in my way, and I'll make sure it's a super-smart way." Then, I wait for the perfect timing as to when to go take them down. What invariably seems to happen -- when I try this is -- something or someone else beats me to it, and takes them down -- and I miss out on the opportunity to "go get them!"

[Bensober]

Hum...This is a "goodum". Coming out of a criminal life style in 1983 there were certain codes of conduct that this would have been real easy to handle. The Internet makes things a little more complicated and the battles we were dealing with out here with certain “mortorsickle clubsâ€

[Bensober]

Just another note to this. Sometimes in getting to, and helping others to "higher ground" is also recognizing that we are all to divine to be the subject of anyone’s abuse.

I agree that an investigation may need attention and that since it is Internet and could be something for the U.S. Federal Prosecutors to eventually deal with… may be apropos.

Keep me posted,

Ben H.

[RichC]

Ben and Dallas

Great advice I must admit from both of you.
Fear is the key word here. Not Fear for myself but Fear my sons future will be ruined.
Cant touch me regardless of the rants.
My career is solid and those around me know it is BS this fool spouts.
But then that isn't really true either now that I think about it.
My Fear would be what others think of me in the movie I figure.
Although everything he spouts off is lies and nobody believes the nonsense anyway; it still (I feel and fear) somehow makes me look bad.
Ahhh crap!!!
Look what ya two have done!!!
Not only have you pointed out that it is Fear but also made me understand it is also Pride and Self Centered in ways too.
Pride in my Son (Which is ok).
My Pride because I am being Self Centered.
The puke may be making me look bad... So to speak...
Damn.
Still hurts a bit to hear the truth.
How bout that.
Gotta watch your movies more often guess.

Them there Character Defects are murder.

Thanks folks.
Personal Inventory here we come yet again.

[Bensober]

Thats also a good awareness for me Rich on the "spouting nonsence" portion. When I am/was in delusion and not aligned most of my energy was "discredited" anyway. It seems the more I'm aligned in my higher powers walk with me...not mine with him...authenticity, value, and attraction at least appeare to be given as a gift to me.

It's hard at times to "Live and Let Live" at times. It's even harder at times when others around us (sicker than most) to "Live and Let Die". I always wanted to do the killing... at my expense. But whether I did or not they usually ended up hitting a bottom (because of thier Karma) in some kind recovery now living healthier lives, dead, or in prison in spite of my behavior or will toward them.

God Bless My Brother...Hang In There,

Ben H.

[Dallas]

People do not define me with their words. It is only me -- that defines me. Their words about me -- define who and what they are -- not who and what I am.

A puke, pukes.

[Dallas]

Somewhere in my stash of useless information -- I have an ebook titled: "The Blackbook of Getting Revenge"

It's an interesting little book that I could have written before sobriety. And, once in a while, it's a fun to read reference.

When I look at it -- it reminds me of how Not-Powerless we are in some areas.

The little book lists hundreds of simple ways that anyone can go after anyone and create overwhelming problems for them -- that normal people normally do not think of.

It's unfortunate, that so many people -- do not understand anything but force. It appears that the only way they'll put down their gun and raise a white flag of surrender -- is when the other guy produces a gun of equal or greater Power and points it in their direction. Suddenly, they have a spiritual awakening and start wanting to become friends.