- Hi im natalie an alcoholic

Hi im natalie an alcoholic




Help for alcohol abuse addiction alcoholics who want to stay sober

Hi im natalie an alcoholic

Postby natshen » Thu Sep 13, 2007 7:53 am

hi im natalie and ive been sober for 10 months , i dont attend aa but i do have a therapist who i work with , one of the things ive noticed about being sober is how uncomfortable i feel when i go out , to me its like a new way to live i used to have a bottle of wine before i went out and could have had a meal with the pope and felt ok now sometimes walmart makes me feel nervous , is this common and does anyone know how to overcome this ? thanks for letting me share
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Postby pglock45 » Thu Sep 13, 2007 8:24 am

Hi My name is Patrick. I'm a grateful recovering alcoholic.
I found that not only was I uncomfortable being out and about. But I was generally uncomfortable with myself as a whole. I do go to meetings..Always have but I have to say I was uncomfortable being there.
With time , and the good people of AA approaching me , I became more comfortable. I've concluded that I Have to go to meetings. I HAVE to get involved in the meetings,and I HAVE to speak with my sponsor frequently to grow in my recovery. At first I didn't share at all in the meetings. I was ashamed and embarrassed. After hearinf others share , I found that there were common threads in there stories as it related to mine . With time , I became much more comfortable . I'm grateful for the program of alcoholics anonymous for I have many more REAL friends now than I ever did. Go to meetings.. Get a sponsor.. Don't pick up the first drink.
Thanks for letting me share.
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Postby Dallas » Thu Sep 13, 2007 9:08 am

Hello Natalie and Patrick!!! Welcome to the board and to the site!!!

Yep. I became very uncomfortable when I got sober. I had always been extremely on the shy side without a drink -- and when I first got sober I could hardly talk. And, it seemed like my mouth, lips -- and tongue -- had lost their coordination.... I would stutter and couldn't complete sentences. :oops:

Now -- that I've been sober for a while -- I feel more relaxed around people. I feel like I could walk into any room any where and strike up a conversation with anyone at any time about anything! :lol: And, I feel as comfortable in a huge room with 1,500 people -- as I do being with one person. I still feel shy often -- but, I've learned some tools to help me overcome the shyness and the feelings like I want to isolate or be alone.

Just about all my progress in social arenas -- I give the credit to my involvement with A.A. My social skills prior to A.A. and A.A. sobriety were .... lacking. Meaning: when I was newly sober without A.A. sobriety -- I wasn't able to function well socially. :lol:

Dallas
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Re: Hi im natalie an alcoholic

Postby garden variety » Thu Sep 13, 2007 10:04 am

natshen wrote:hi im natalie and ive been sober for 10 months , i dont attend aa but i do have a therapist who i work with , one of the things ive noticed about being sober is how uncomfortable i feel when i go out , to me its like a new way to live i used to have a bottle of wine before i went out and could have had a meal with the pope and felt ok now sometimes walmart makes me feel nervous , is this common and does anyone know how to overcome this ? thanks for letting me share


Hi Natalie,

The first thing you mentioned is that being sober is "a new way to live". You are absolutely 100% right about that. "Being sober" is a big change from "not being sober" and it takes "work" to make the lifestyle of sobriety work. We follow 12 suggested steps which are a program of recovery from addiction to alcohol that are published by the National Service Board of Alcoholics Anonymous. Working through the 12 steps of AA gives people like me a new "design for living that really works" - In other words it teaches a person who has lived for years as a "dysfunctional" alcoholic how to live a "sane" and "sound" life without the need to drink or use mind-altering substances to achieve inner peace and "serenity".

Without the 12 steps and AA, I would be way more than uncomfortable or nervous...I would be "stark raving sober"! In other words I would have an "untreated mental condition" - I would look and act insane. That is just how I acted when I was newly sober. Like you, I found that any confidence I had while drinking had totally disappeared. There were things that I could do while actively drinking that I couldn't do anymore. It was like I took an overdose of "incompetency" pills or something. I felt like I had an extreme case of "stupid" and "awkward" (alcoholism is treatable - "stupid" is not!). But the 12 Steps, the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, and the fellowship of AA meetings changed all that. Drastically.

Now I noticed that you didn't identify yourself as "alcoholic" but were seeing a therapist. Check out our forums and read about our lives and the way we learn to live life on life's terms. "If you decide you want what we have, and are willing to go to any length to get it, then you are ready to take certain steps."

Thanks for dropping in and welcome.
Paul
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Postby carol1017 » Thu Sep 13, 2007 10:06 am

Boy, can I relate!!!!

Toward the end of my drinking, I needed a couple of drinks just to go to the grocery store. I always drank before a party or going out to dinner, so by the time I got sober, I had absolutely no concept of how to cope with life without alcohol.

AA meetings helped me with that. Like Dallas, when I first started going to meetings, I couldn't even tell people my name, much less speak whole sentences. I was scared to go anywhere or do anything without my booze crutch.

The people in the rooms of AA were patient with me and I slowly started feeling comfortable around them. Now, I feel comfortable walking into any AA room anywhere, knowing I will be accepted.

Going to meetings improved my socialization skills, and working the Steps made me comfortable in my own skin. Doing service in AA gave me confidence.

Natalie, congratulations on 10 months of sobriety -- that's awesome! I do hope you will consider going to AA meetings if possible -- it can make a world of difference.
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Postby garden variety » Thu Sep 13, 2007 10:07 am

Hello and welcome to you too Patrick.

Glad you could join us. Stop in our forums and take a look-see. We're all here to help.

God bless,
Paul
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Postby anniemac » Thu Sep 13, 2007 11:55 am

Hi Natalie,

Congratulations on being sober for 10 months. Is there a particular reason that you don't attend AA? AA and therapy are very different, and they are not mutually exclusive.

I was very awkward and self-conscious when I first got sober. I was also highly sensitive. Freedom from that came to me from working the 12 Steps of AA. AA is a program of action and a program for living. Talking to my therapist is wonderful and I love the insights we uncover, but nothing beats action to effect change in my life.

There's an expression in AA: I can't think my way in to right action, but I can act my way in to right thinking.

Welcome to you, also, Patrick! Yes, the identification I found in meetings made it easier for me to be in my own skin.
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Postby natshen » Thu Sep 13, 2007 12:30 pm

hi i have been to some aa meeting but not many, i have been working the steps with my therapist , i dont think i would be sober today if i had not had the big book and my therapist giving me worksheets , im looking forward to the day when i feel comfortable in my own skin.So much has been buried underneath and some of its painfull so im discovering all ive hidden over the last 15 years of drinking.My mind has been playing tricks on me for a long time and now im trying to fight it , but sometimes its like fighting with myself the old me and the new me , thankfully to god the new me is winning , but im so glad i found this site as just reading other peoples stories gives me courage to keep winning the battle thanks
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Postby Dallas » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:45 pm

Hey Natalie,

We're glad you found this site, also! :wink:

I encourage you to pull up your chair, keep logged-in, and make yourself at home! I believe I can speak for myself and the others on this one... "we all care about you and we are here to help you if you desire."

That's really great that your Therapist is familiar with the 12 Steps, with the Big Book, and with A.A.

I've heard -- that there are a lot of Thereapists, these days -- who are implementing the 12 Steps for some of their clients, and I've heard that some are achieving outstanding results with it!!! I think that makes it double-awesome for you to have both, a Therapist that you can talk with, who will be sensitive and knowledgeable to your needs, and also a Therapist who is familiar with the 12 Steps. You got lucky!!! Perhaps, your therapist may want to check out Step12.com -- and see if he/she can find something that will be useful for them or for their other clients.

It's great to have you! And, you probably already know it -- but, I'll say it anyway -- "it keeps getting better and better and better and better" -- when we use the tools of the 12 Steps and we do everything possible to not have another drink! :lol:

Dallas
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Postby natshen » Thu Sep 13, 2007 2:26 pm

i met my therapist through a mandatory court orered dui therapy , the dui was probably one the best things to happen to me , and it is only through the dui that i even knew about alcoholism , i thought all alcoholics were winos on the street and needed to have a drink to get up , i didnt realise i neither functioned without alcohol.My therapist is an alcoholic and has alot of years in aa so im lucky when i think im going crazy he sais to me "crazy people dont know their going crazy" so that helps me to see im sane just sober
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