- OPINIONS we all have one

OPINIONS we all have one




Discussions related to 12 Step Recovery and Treatment

OPINIONS we all have one

Postby ccs » Wed Jan 07, 2009 6:55 pm

hey guys how`s everyone Happy New Year !!!

I just want to talk about opinions in my opinion everyone has one just like everyone has an ( A) well you know what I mean
my opinion may not be the same as yours and visa versa
thats what makes life so intresting it would be pretty boring if we were all the same
and we all have a right to our own opinions whether right or wrong but whose to say whats right and what is wrong whats right for you may not be whats right for me

love and tolerence is the A.A. way so I dont have to agree with you and you dont have to agree with me but if we are practicing the principles
then we listen with an openmind and agree to disagree hopefully we can do this without harming others

so when I strongly disagree with another I some times have to step back and do a little inventory to see if there`s something I need to work on
I know from personal experience that some times what I see in others is something in me that I am overlooking why is it so easy to see our own opinion of fault in others before we see it in ourselves? does this make sense to any one else? or is my insanity starting to return :lol:

just something I`ve been thinking about that I thought I would share with all my family here
I had a sponsor that used to tell me that its none of my buisiness what others think of me and none of theirs what I think of them :roll:

just something to chew on

LUV-2-ALL Cessie
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Postby sunlight » Wed Jan 07, 2009 11:50 pm

You have a belly button too? :lol:

Can't post long, just dropping by to say that I'm happy to see you!

Thanks for giving me something to chew on!

Later.....
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Postby Dallas » Thu Jan 08, 2009 5:07 am

One day I started observing my opinions... as if they were my character defects.... and I decided that I wanted God to remove them... so, I worked on doing what I could and let Him work on what He did... and I gave up my need to have my opinions.

Once I did that... I got along better with others. And, when I wasn't getting along better with others... I discovered that generally... the reason why we weren't getting along very well -- was not because of the opinion that I didn't have -- it was because they had needs to have their particular opinions that they had.

Opinions for me... are my old ideas. When I'm having opinions... I'm living my life on old information and old ideas.

I have to let go of my old ideas and old ideas, absolutely... if I want to experience joy and happiness in my life and a peacefulness that's beyond my imagining it.

Now, what someone else has to do is their business and not mine. If they want to live with opinions (like I was taught to must have an opinion to be "whole" and acceptable and functionable)... and if they have opinions... that's up to them.

There is a better way -- when we look for it. But, we'll never find the better way if we're always stuck with our old way of living and doing things.

Some people have told me that "it's impossible to not have opinions." I smile. It was also impossible for me to be sober! But, I'm doing it! And... how would life change... if bees believed our scientific opinions that they can't fly? We'd have to find another way to have honey, and different kinds of flowers and plants and stuff that the bees do for us! :lol:

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Postby sunlight » Thu Jan 08, 2009 8:31 pm

Opinions used to mean a lot to me, especially my own! :lol:
I would tie myself in knots trying to live up to peoples' good opinions of me & put up a lot of walls to keep out their bad opinions of me. It wore me out, & I got to where I didn't know who I was & didn't care either. Just leave me alone & let me drink! :evil:

When I got my 24 hour chip, I saw that it said on it, "to thine own self be true". Huh? How am I supposed to be true to myself if I don't even KNOW myself?

As I began taking the steps, I got to see more of who I really was, most of which I didn't like very much! :x But some very tough women assured me it would change & they did not baby anyone, so I was inclined to believe them, sort of.

Then, at a women's meeting, someone said, "Seek God's compliments", and that turned my head around to a new way of thinking & being. It's God's opinion of me that matters, and with His grace, it will be a favorable one! It's what motivates me today.

When I was taking the 11th step with my sponsor, she told me to bring all the daily meditation books I read. When she saw them, she said, "That's excessive. Why so many?" I said it works for me, & even if I don't retain it consciously, it's in the back of my brain & things seem to pop out when I need them. I said, "Listen to this..." & read her a quote. She said, "That's awesome! Let me write that down! I know just the woman who needs to hear that!" And she changed her opinion & now wants me to look in thrift stores for meditation books for her!

The storyteller who comes to our group always prefaces his sharing with, "My name is --- & I'm an alcoholic, & what I say is my own experience & opinion." And I respect his opinion, because I know the things that he DOES. It's not just hot air.
But it's not the same as truth. If his opinion was that I was not an alcoholic, I would have to dismiss it because that's not true. I know myself well enough today to know that! :lol:

I think I'm rambling, so time for a meeting! :D
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Postby garden variety » Fri Jan 09, 2009 2:56 pm

You know how I hate to agree with Dallas... :twisted:

But I do. Probably close to 100% agreement.

My opinions are "old ideas" just like Dallas said. Lots of times, they are 100% true and based on fact. Which means lots of times I'm 100% in line with "Truth". I mean the real Truth. But then it's not really "my opinion" anymore when it's in 100% agreement with Truth. It really just becomes a part of my daily 3rd step - which means I consent to the Truth.

I've learned that I really need to keep an eye on ideas or thoughts which I "feel" passionate about because those can be "opinions" instead of Truth. Let's just say I have a "belief system" which has been known to be "faulty" or "defective" or "peculiar" in certain ways. My "belief system" is made up of my "opinions" and "perceptions". So that's why I have the 10th step and use it a whole lot. I inventory the crap out of things, but it usually leads me to Truth instead of "opinion".

The greatest Truth that I've ever known is this one: "To be vital, faith must be accompanied by self sacrifice and unselfish constructive action." This Truth can be found in our book on page 93. I adapted this Truth with Dallas' favorite Truth of "action and more action" which can be found on page 88 of our book.

This is where I came up with "Constructive Action Never Fails". That's not anywhere specifically in the book, but I really believe it's more than just my "opinion" - it's proven itself in my life over and over again. I've also seen it work in the lives of others.

Those two Truths are what I base my entire "belief system" upon. I know I can rely on ACTION to always lead me to the Truth. That's how it is in our recovery text, and it's also defines what that carpenter fellow said in a certain "sermon" that he gave to a bunch of people somewhere on some "mount" a long time ago. Those words are great to read and live by for me, but I really believe that the carpenter was a man of action, too. I think the author Emmett Fox does a remarkable job of bringing this to life in a spiritual or "universal" way instead of "religion" in his book called "Sermon on the Mount".
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