Where I am today

Discussions related to 12 Step Recovery and Treatment
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Where I am today

Postby Jools » Fri Apr 24, 2009 6:30 pm

Greetings friends,

Today I celebrate 6 months sober by the grace of God and the program of alcoholics anonymous. I am so thankful for you people who've reached out to help me when I thought I was going to go crazy.

I am finally able to start my 4th step and any and all advice would be appreciated. I'm really looking forward to doing it because I want to get rid of all the things that block me off from the sunlight of the Spirit. I want to be happy, joyus and free, but most importantly, I want to be of maximum service to God.

Thanx again for all your help.


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Postby ccs » Fri Apr 24, 2009 8:47 pm

(((((((((((((((JULIE))))))))))))))) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yeah!!! 6 mnths :D :D :D :D :D :D :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink:

awesome goood for you girl keep up the good work
all can say about my 4th step is that I worried too much and got myself all worked up I scared the hell out of myself by thinking too much about it ( and I know I`m not supposed to be thinking without ADULT supervision!!) thinking worrying and procrastinating was what really drove me crazy once I made the decision to pick up the 1000 pound pen it just kinda flowed right along wasnt that bad at all in fact it was great!!
all the worry was for nothin !!!! :lol: :lol: LUV YA Cess

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Postby Worm » Fri Apr 24, 2009 8:48 pm

Congratulations on 6 months! I'm working on 9 myself.

I'm not far removed from doing the 4th and 5th steps. The key for me on the 4th was getting the pen to the paper. And getting in a quiet place that I could only think about what I was doing. For me I went to a meeting and stayed at the AA house afterwards by myself. I tried to do it at home but had too many distractions.

I had a really hard time getting the pen on the paper. Once I did the thoughts and words did start flowing though.

I prayed that God would help me let all those things I had been keeping inside me OUT. I prayed for him to help me stay HONEST when I wrote it down.

I pray to God to be with you every step you take in taking this step. God bless........

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Postby ROBERT » Fri Apr 24, 2009 9:24 pm

just do it

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Postby sunlight » Sat Apr 25, 2009 11:31 am

Happy 6 months, Julie!!! :D

Has it really been that long? We must be having fun because time is flying! :lol:

I want to thank you for sharing your sobriety with us. It has been such a joy and blessing to see you grow and thrive. Your openness and honesty are an inspiration, and your ability to laugh at yourself & the world is a real gift to all! There aren't words enough to thank you for being here and giving yourself.

Step 4: I had to make sure that I had a solid step 3. Before I even picked up the pen, I went back & meditated on what it meant to turn my life & will over to the care of God. Had I done this as best as I could, with a sincere heart? I searched and connected with His presence inside me & asked for the courage & strength to see and face what was blocking me from His sunlight. I couln't face myself without His help! With His power I could carry on boldly! :wink:

Then, I followed the directions in the book. Can't go wrong there!
If I got stuck, I called my sponsor or talked to others (in a general way; don't want fuel for the gossip fires! :lol: )

Geoff did a really helpful example of the 4th step in the Steps forum. I find it useful to refer to it, with others & myself.

To me, step 4 is housecleaning. Now that can be scarey if I haven't dusted in 30 years! :lol: But, I have a Sanitation Engineer Who helps me to see the stuff that I've been hiding under the bed, (hoping others & I won't see it :roll: ) & clean it out. The past loses it's power to hurt me. It melts away in the light of His love. Remember the song, "Sunshine of Your Love"?
..."I've been waiting so long, to be where I'm going, in the sunshine of Your love..." That's how the 4th step is for me.


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Postby Dallas » Sat Apr 25, 2009 7:15 pm

Hey Julie! Congrats on your six months!!!


1. Ask your sponsor if she wouldn't mind walking you through your 4th Step, kind of like Dr. Bob took his sponsees through the Steps.

2. Do it now. The book reads: "Next we launched out on a course of vigorous action, the first step of which is a personal housecleaning, which many of us had never attempted. Though our decision was a vital and crucial step, it could have little permanent effect unless at once followed by a strenuous effort to face, and to be rid of, the things in ourselves
which had been blocking us." pg 63-64, Big Book

The 4th Step is the first of 12 Steps, that gives us a specific timeline as to how long to wait after we've made our 3rd Step Decision.

a. "Next (right after making our 3rd Step Decision) we launched" (as in rocketed into vigorous action to start and complete Steps 4 through 9.

b. We know Bill didn't like to repeat himself... but here, he considers it so vital to our life and sobriety... he repeats... "Though our decision (3rd Step) was a vital and crucial step... it could have little permanent effect... unless AT ONCE followed by a strenuous effort to face (Step 5)... and be rid of, (Steps 6, 7, 8, 9) the things in ourselves which had been blocking us."

Best wishes,


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Postby ccs » Sun Apr 26, 2009 10:18 pm

Fourth Step Prayer

Dear God,
It is I who has made my life a mess.
I have done it, but I cannot undo it.
My mistakes are mine and I will begin a
searching and fearless moral inventory.
I will write down my wrongs,
but I will also include that which is good.
I pray for the strength to complete the task.


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Postby DiggerinVA » Mon Apr 27, 2009 3:28 pm

Build that Arch well. And don't wait around on it. Things are better on the other side. ;-)


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Postby Anja » Mon Apr 27, 2009 11:30 pm

I'm presently on hold from the latest Fourth Step. Had just gotten dug in and family illness has called my attention. It's very much an odd place to be.

I think Digger's suggestion to not sit on it is a good one. My experience has been that if I am doing it well it's going to hurt. I was surprised to feel some old free-floating shame. Ended up nearly overdosing on oatmeal cookies. Heh.

Whoa! Mystified. Talked to sponsor who reminded me that I was going through the Fourth Step process. I'd forgotten how uncomfortable one of those fearless looks at the ickies can be.

So then a vacation came up and she suggested that since I didn't have time to complete a Fifth Step that I give it a rest until I came back. Good enough. It was easy to let it go on vacation and I actually wondered if I'd be able to get back to the emotionally vulnerable spot I was in earlier. When I got home I discovered that my Mom's health had taken a turn for the worse and sponsor and I talked together about postponing the process.

But I've been uncomfortable enough with this unfinished business that I'm chomping at the bit to "admit to God, myself and another person" and enjoy the liberating freedom of that expression of what I no longer want.

garden variety
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Postby garden variety » Tue Apr 28, 2009 2:34 pm

Great work my friend! Congratulations!

You'll get to that 4th Dimension soon!

For me, any decision without being followed by action is nothing more than fantasy.

God bless,

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