No Longer a Victim

Discussions related to 12 Step Recovery and Treatment
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Joined: Fri Aug 05, 2005 2:34 am

No Longer a Victim

Postby Tim » Fri Dec 23, 2005 12:00 am

I prefer to think of myself not as a victim of my problems, but as a survivor. Being a victim opens up wounds in a way that allows me wallow in self-pity, resentment, bitterness, discontent, and anger at my life. I find that I can even take a certain pride in my victimhood. This does not help me and, in fact, makes me a prisoner of the past rather than a person who has survived and is capable of change when confronted with problems.

Calling myself a victim invites more victimization from people and situations. As a survivor I can learn to sail through the roughest storms. I may not be able to change the wind, but I can adjust my sails. With the help of God and others, I do not need to be a victim. As a survivor I can face the future confidently with the knowledge that I have the tools I need to face any problem that arises. And if God is for me, who can be against me.

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Postby Dallas » Fri Dec 23, 2005 7:48 am

Tim, you said that very well!!!

Are you sure you're not a mind reader? Sometimes when you post a message.. I look at it... and feel like "Wow... that's exactly like I understand it! How did he do that?"

I really appreciate the ideas that you express and your ability to express them so clearly. If you haven't gotten the message... that I think I'm trying to express... it's "More! More! More! I like this stuff! I want to hear more!"

Responsibility: "The ability to respond"

Yep. I like stuff like that, too. If I am responsible... I have the ability to respond... rather than just react!" It means that I'm not powerless over every thing... I can make different choices, make different decisions, and take different actions, which leads to getting "better and better and better and better!" And, if I have the ability to respond... I'm no longer a victim!

Thanks Tim.


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