- Daily Reflections

Daily Reflections




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Daily Reflections

Postby 1dayatatime36 » Thu Apr 06, 2006 2:55 am

Hello..i found a book from many years ago when i was in treatment and it is called Daily Reflections. It is a message for every day of the year..it is a book by AA members, for AA members, and just thought if i shared it with you everyday, it would mean i would be here everyday, learning from all of you through your thoughts, suggestions, and insights of staying sober..so, here is Today's..April 5, 2006..True BrotherHood...
We have not once sought to be one in a family, to be a friend among friends, to be a worker among workers, to be a useful member of society. Always we tried to struggle to the top of the heap, or to hide underneath it. This self-centered behavior blocked a partnership relation with any one of those about us. Of true brotherhood we had small comprehension.
This message contained in step four was the first one i heard loud and clear; I hadn't seen myself in print before! Prior to my coming into AA, i knew of no place that could teach me how to become a person among persons. From my very first meeting, i saw people doing just that and i wanted what they had. One of the reasons that i'm a happy, sober alcoholic today is that i'm learning this most important lesson.

Well, that was today's reading, and it is funny that just last night i was asking and wondering if it was possible to be happy and sober at the same time, and after talking with two ladies, one last night, and one today, i found them to be very happy..and i hope to be just like that when my time comes..thank you for letting me share this reading with you..Tonya
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Postby Dallas » Thu Apr 06, 2006 5:32 am

Hey Tonya! That's what this deal is all about... to be sober AND happy at the same time! I didn't know that, the first time I came to AA, so I ended up doing it backwards... which led to drinking again.

A good friend of mine, with many years sober, often says "If you've been in AA, for a while... and you're not happy... then, you're doing it wrong!" I totally agree!

The program of AA is the 12 Steps. The meetings are just where the Fellowship of AA gets together. Once upon a time, I thought the meetings were the program... and until I learned otherwise... I wasn't too happy.

After I learned that the 12 Steps is the AA program, and took the 12 Steps, and began practicing the Steps every day, it changed my personality sufficient enough so that I could recover... and it gave me the tools to change the way I thought and felt about anything... which gave me the power and the ability to be happy, joyous and free... while sober. That's what it means, "it works (the 12 Steps) if you work it."

Keep coming back! And, thanks for sharing!

Dallas
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Happy and Sober

Postby wareagle10 » Thu Apr 06, 2006 1:14 pm

Hey, Tonya; I don't quite understand, you said you hope that you can be just like those ladies when "your time comes"! Tonya, your time HAS COME AND IT IS RIGHT NOW!!!! You don't have to wait for anything to be happy and sober, just be it.
I am glad that you are sharing on the board, things will just keep getting better and better, day by day in every way.
Take care and straight ahead, John.
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Postby 1dayatatime36 » Thu Apr 06, 2006 10:37 pm

Hi wareagle10,
Sometimes i do get so excited, like, wow, i am really doing this, but most of the time right now, it is just total focus on staying sober, and there is so much fear in me right now, so much tension, sort of like failure is right around the corner if i dont stay totally focused every minute of all the bad things that alcohol caused me and so i guess that is what i meant by when my time comes, when i can sort of relax and not have to have this heaviness about me all the time, that i can be humorous, and just laugh and let myself be free, because right now i still feel so captive..if that makes sense..i realize that the work is for the rest of my life, one day at a time, as i am an alcoholic and always will be, but i am just feeling like i just lost my bestfriend, and i have been told that a lot of people as active alcoholics see their drink as their bestfriend, until we realize it is our worst enemy, which is how, i think most become sober, or recovering alcoholics..i guess i am just still lost and too early into sobriety to understand or grasp just what being sober is going to do to my life..the wonderful things that are going to happen, like you said..i have never been sober for more than 3 months at a time in the last 24 years..so i am desperate to learn this program so that i can have all that is waiting for me and my family..peace, happiness, honesty..seeing life in a whole new way..so, thank you for letting me know that i should be having my time right now, i might be looking at things all wrong right now..i do go to my first meeting tomorrow night, and i am looking forward to learning something from all of them..just by being accepted..thanks for listening..Tonya
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My time

Postby wareagle10 » Fri Apr 07, 2006 12:13 am

Hi Tonya: When I first got sober I believe that fear was the motivating factor more than anything else. The fear that I might not be able to make this thing work. I actually nurtured the fear to the point that the thought of a drink would actually start me to tasting my mouth to see if I actually did or not. The first few weeks are the hardest, we know only one way of dealing with emotions and that is to drink over them. We now have to learn a new way. I would suggest that you get as many phone numbers as possible tomorrow night. You need to have someone that you can talk to when the urge hits you. It would be a good idea to have AA central office handy also (phone number), they have people that can get with you right away, or, at least talk to you while someone else comes out to where you are. Just don't take that first drink no matter what. We have a saying in California that you don't take a drink even if your ass falls off, and if it does, pick it up and bring to a meeting and if we can't put it back on we'll show you a new way to sit down. Ha.
I go to a Friday night meeting, have for 24 1/2 years, 22 1/2 of those sober. That means that for the first 2 years I didn't stay sober. But I kept going because it was the most important thing in my life. Without sobriety I would certainly be dead today. I would have lost my family, business, home, friends, everything that I hold dear. I know that it is the same for you right now. It will get better, I guarantee, JUST DON'T DRINK!! I will be holding good thoughts for you today and at the meeting tomorrow night. Continue to take those small baby steps that you did yesterday when you went out and got back home, pumping your fist and yelling "YES". When you do those things give someone a call or come on the board and let us know. We know and understand all those feelings, we have had them also, plus the same fears. Put them out here and let us help with our own similar stories to show you that YOU ARE NOT ALONE ANYMORE. We are here to help.
Take care and straight ahead, John.

PS: I bet you got the support from your husband on the meeting and on your decision. Good luck.
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Postby 1dayatatime36 » Fri Apr 07, 2006 1:04 am

Hello again wareagle10,
as you can see, i spend a good amount of time on here :) I also have been reading The Big Book on line which is what i just got done with..thank you so very much for sharing those words with me..especially how important it is to just not take that first drink, and to get to the meetings and also how there is so much in common with alcoholics, and i feel that i can be related to in this..i do have phone numbers, and i have actually talked to "blueangel", she is who i will be sharing a meeting with tomorrow, and she is a great listener and gives some great advice, and has gotten me in touch with another lady as well..it is overwhelming to see all the support i have gotten in just two days, no wonder if you keep coming back and work the program you can stay sober, and be happy..thank you for sharing your start in sobriety..that will get me through this evening anyway, and i will start all over again tomorrow, finding anything and everything to keep me sober..that is what is important to me most..and thank you for caring about a complete stranger, offering all the support and help and encouragement, a place i can come to for such humbling experiences..and well, my husband supports me getting and staying sober whatever it takes..i will have to elaborate on that more later, because at some point if i am going to have all of you as my supporters, you will have to get to know a little bit about me i guess...thank you so much for sharing..especially about the California thing and the importance of getting to a meeting, :lol: Take care, Tonya..
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Recovery

Postby wareagle10 » Fri Apr 07, 2006 1:13 am

You are welcome. But, you do as much for me as you say I do for you, funny how it works, huh.
Take care and straight ahead, John.
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Postby 1dayatatime36 » Wed May 03, 2006 6:41 am

From "Winner Takes All:"

"[B]efore A.A. it didn't matter how good things got --
I always had a feeling that something was wrong.
Since A.A., it doesn't matter how bad things get -- I
always have a feeling that everything is going to be
all right.

"In working the Twelve Steps, my life and my old way
of thinking have changed. I have no control over some
of the things that happen in my life, but with the
help of God I can now choose how I will respond.
Today I choose to be happy, and when I'm not, I have
the tools of this program to put me back on track."

c. 2001, Alcoholics Anonymous, page 381
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Postby Rusty Zipper » Wed May 03, 2006 11:52 am

hi tonya, gald your doing... theres a story in the Big Book ### BB ####... Freedom from fear, or the Man that conqored fear... its not in my book, i have a old timer... so not shure the exact title... its one of the two... please try to read it... it changed my reaction to fear BIG TIME.... we all love you T .... trudgery.... thats what we do..........ha!......agw & tol, (_z_)
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Postby 1dayatatime36 » Wed May 03, 2006 12:51 pm

Thanks for the information in the BB, always helpful to me, reference..i'm not sure where i got that "winner takes all", some website, but it is good to know that my old ways of thinking will eventually go away by working the 12 steps, and that no matter how bad things get, it will be ok..have a great day Rusty..Tonya
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