Tonya wrote: being honest about how hard it is to be honest and to be aware that it is something that i have to work on everyday
Thank you, Tonya, for taking the time to post that message and to share with us!!! I really get a lot out of the messages that you post, and I appreciate you taking the time and using your willingness to share!
That's quite a statement "being honest about how hard it is to be honest and to be aware that it is something that i have to work on everyday"
I sure understand that one!!! Daily effort = daily progress. And, it's something that I must do every day, or I'll automatically slip back in to my old way of living life... and, then, I'll automatically become uncomfortable... restless, irritable and discontented.
For me, now... it is a lot easier for me to stay sober... than it would be for me to get sober. I don't sit around thinking about drinking anymore... but, I could be doing that and would be doing that... if I neglect to take the effort to make daily progress in areas like honesty.
The pain from being honest has never been as great as the pain that I went through to get sober! Even though, at times honesty can be painful.
Sometimes, in some areas of my life, I've discovered that it's wise for me to seek counsel from my sponsor in regards to honesty, and in the approach that I use to "make amends or to clean up something that I've been dishonest about." Left to my own devices, I've proved to myself over and over again... that even though what I'm attempting to do... might be a good idea... it may not be practical, and could have damaging results... if I proceed to counsel myself in critical areas. I guess I call that "trying to do the right thing... but doing the right thing backwards." My motives and intentions can be good... but I can make things worse because of my inexperience.
Perhaps it's Life's way of trying to teach me humility... in the sense that "I need other people in my life, and the guidance of other people... if I truly want to live happy, joyous and free." You see, if I could do it all on my own... I wouldn't need other people... and when I think I don't need other people... I'll soon begin to think I don't need God... and as soon as I begin to think that I don't need God... I'll probably start believing or acting in such a way, as to think that "I am God." So by needing and using the help of other people... it helps to remind me that "I'm not God."
Oh what a relief that is!
Thanks for letting me share!