- AA Meeting Behavior

AA Meeting Behavior




Topics related to AA Meetings - and alcohol addiction recovery

AA Meeting Behavior

Postby Tim » Mon Mar 12, 2012 1:22 pm

What is your opinion about appropriate individual conduct/behavior during an AA meeting? This can be a very broad topic, but I am interested specifically in what you think about how members behave when sitting in an AA meeting.

Over the course of many years, here are some examples of the things I've seen during meetings:

Knitting/sewing
Doing crossword or other puzzles
Phone Texting, etc
Side Talk
Reading (other than the what is being read/discussed as a topic)
Sleeping
Eating
Fights (Verbal and Physical)

I'm not making a public judgment of these behaviors or others that you and I have witnessed, but I will say that my approach to AA meetings is that one of the reasons that I am there is to pay attention and to respect others. Whatever distracts me--or others--from paying attention or acting with respect should be avoided.

What do you think is acceptable?
Tim
 
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Postby Dallas » Mon Mar 12, 2012 7:39 pm

Someone has to be different -- so let it be me. I'll make a public judgement. :lol:

We've had many new threads started here in the forum recently that deal w/ the behaviors and the profanity in meetings. Evidently it must be now getting to others as much as it's gotten to me in the past.

I prefer structure and discipline in meetings. Since I rarely find it in the local groups where I live -- I soak up as much of it as I can get when visiting my home groups 1500 miles away from home.

For me, I now hang out in the back -- with the newcomer's & court card signers. They are much more respectable in their behaviors -- than the AA's who've been around a while and sit up front doing stuff to get attention and letting everyone know that they are there. (In case we might miss the fact that they are there).

I realize this sounds brutal. I'm not complaining -- just honestly accepting and appraising it as it is.

Is there a solution? The only solution that I can see for it is -- to get a book, a coffee pot and a few bleeding deacons to start a new meeting with structure and discipline. And, let the whiners & complainers talk about "how horrible it is over there in those new meetings w/ structure & discipline!" :lol: If we bring up a discussion of the problem in the meeting -- they seem to soon want to run us out. :lol:
Dallas
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Postby Dallas » Mon Mar 12, 2012 7:40 pm

I was mentioning on FB recently that it sure would be nice -- if we could get two new designations printed in meeting directories as to "type" of meeting.
One designation would be "For those who have a desire to stay sober."
And, the other designation would be "For those who want to recover."
Dallas
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Postby MKL » Tue Mar 13, 2012 6:38 am

Us alkies are selfcentered so i've seen it all at meetings. I too prefer structure but not fire and brimestone structure, my late sponsors homegroup in Denver, Co , called the Godsquad, which numbers over 100, had rules like you couldn't share if you had under 5 years at their meeting, plus if you were a visitor, forget getting a chance to share. They were more exclusive than a mans club. I've also seen meetings where anything goes and people are allowed to share as long as they want, sometimes ranting and raving for over 20 minutes, seen some whose every other word was a 4 letter word, seen meetings where the meeting topics where pop pschology, not BB topics, not recovery, been at meetings where an oldtimer who chairs the meeting has to give a 5 diatribe after anyone chairs, been to meetings where newcomers run it not the oldtimers, you name it, i've seen it. I believe meetings need structure tempered with love and tolerance, for the sake of all.
MKL
 
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Postby Dallas » Tue Mar 13, 2012 12:27 pm

Yep. I agree. Extreme rigidity is not cool.

I don't go to meetings trying to get recovery. I go in the hopes that I can find that one person who desires to recover and then offer to help them, if they want my help. I usually find them in the back of the meeting w/ the newcomers and those that need a court card signed. So I sit with them back there.

If the meeting is not focused on recovery through AA, I prefer to spend my time cruising the parking lot of a rescue mission or Salvation Army or a drying out place like under a bridge -- to carry the message and see if someone wants it.

I love carrying the message on the Internet -- but, I can't let that replace face-to-face working w/ other alcoholics.

However -- I do make a lot of face-to-face contacts for the purpose of sobriety and recovery -- as a result of the Internet.

The deal is -- it keeps me sober -- trying to help the other alcoholic. (Chapter 7).
Dallas
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Postby MKL » Tue Mar 13, 2012 4:23 pm

I don't go to meetings for recovery, i found it working steps. I help other alkies because that's my job. Sometimes i can only do internet meetings because of my health but i try to do f2f when i can. When i'm out on a drilling rig, internet meetings are all i can do and when i'm sick, which is alot the last few years, internet meetings give me an avenue to be usefull so for me,sometimes internet meetings are all i can do on a day.I work as a security guard for now, but when if i get my health back, i'll go back to the rigs. When i sobered up i had the strength to go to 21 meetings a week and work 60 hours a week but no more due to various physical afflictions. One of my best friends, sober over 50 years lost his legs due to diabetes so has a meeting 2x a week at his place.I only go to meetings to find those who want to recover not to listen to dissertations on pschobabble. To me , if meetings aren't grounded in the BB and recovery as per the BB they are bs. I've given lots of alkies the steps, help take them thru the steps so i understand where you are coming from Dallas. God is my life, i help others because it's my job, i do it because that's what God asks of me to do.
MKL
 
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