Praying for your enemies and resentments

Experiences along the way that bring us closer to our Higher Power in 12 Step Sobriety and Moments of Clarity.
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Joined: Tue Jul 08, 2008 12:33 pm

Postby Berdie » Thu Jul 10, 2008 1:46 pm

garden variety wrote:... what you said about your trip to the hospital - to hold the hand and pray for a man who tormented you the most of all men. That brings tears to my eyes.

That could not have come from you . Berdie.

God bless you my friend and thank you for reminding me who is my "new Employer".

Hi Paul,

It definitely could NOT have come from the rage & anger filled woman I once was, that's for sure. I had forgiven some people of various things, but not to the same massive degree I was going to have to forgive him. When God set free those feelings of hate, rage, anger, hurt and pain from his past actions by helping me forgive, he opened the door for me to be useful to Him in trying to help ***name omitted*** see the light. He chose later not to see it.

I've had the opportunity to speak to him about AA, and offered to go with him to meetings when he told me he needed help when his wife walked out on him. Later I discovered it was only for the sake that she was also reading the e-mails and I guess he thought she'd come back if he was making an attempt. She didn't, he didn't and nothing changed. (If nothing changes, nothing changes...)

God bless you. I hope you have a great day.

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Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 3:44 am

Postby anik1234 » Tue Oct 25, 2011 3:49 am

Armed with that loophole, I pray for them to be surrounded by a healing white light so that, when healed, they will no longer need to behave in the way that was offensive.

Guess I've got a ways to go!

Serenity Seeker
Posts: 56
Joined: Mon Nov 21, 2011 10:10 pm

Re: Praying for your enemies and resentments

Postby Serenity Seeker » Mon Nov 21, 2011 10:39 pm

garden variety wrote:This was one of those things that hit me like a ton of bricks just a little while ago. This is a little long - sorry.

Theres that thing in the book thats called the "resentment prayer" - I think its somewhere in How it Works - It says I'm supposed to ask God to help me give the person I'm mad at the same patience, tolaerance and understanding that I would "cheerfully give" to a sick friend. Then it goes on to tell me how to ask God to keep me from getting angry at them. Boy I hated that "cheerfully" thing - made my blood boil at first.

But you know sponsors they tell you that you have a resentment and maybe you should pray for the guy. Thats the time I really hate sponsors. But I do what he says anyhow because it works. So I was doing this and got used to praying for people I had a grudge against. After a while God started educating me that its the only way I can pray for someone I dont like that makes sense. I pray that God blesses them like He does to me - that way nothing I pray for them is against His will. I dont ask Him to do anything different than I ask Him to do for me.

Well this made sense to me and it always works for me because my resentment and anger goes away. But the problem I kept on having is that darn "cheerful" thing. I can pray for these people that are my enemies and mean it with my heart - but jeez cheerful? I pray for them because I know its right and it works, but I sure dont like doing it. And the book also says that there are things I have to do that I dont like to do.

So I got this book by a catholic guy named Thomas Keating because I heard he was good on meditation which I want to do better because its part of step 11 and getting closer to God. Then I read this part in the first couple chapters.

Father Keating says that when we have war and violence and hate - we are hurting God. Then I thought for a minute that if I hate somebody or have a resentment against them - then I have the same feelings about God. God loves me and helps me the most out of everyone so why would I want to hurt Him? Then Father Keating goes on to say that God is so much acquainted with our lives and our deaths that Jesus said "Whatever you do to the least of these little ones, you do the same unto me."

Boy did that hit me like a ton of bricks. If Im driving down the road and some guy cuts me off and I fly my middle finger at him - I'm doing the same thing to God! If I wish that sorry S.O.B. who critiszed me at the meeting would eat poop and die - Im wishing that would happen to God. This whole thing that Father Keating wrote really opened my eyes and gave me a "moment of clarity" that I really needed.

Now I can "cheerfully" pray for those that do me wrong. Because its better for them to get to know God in a better way than for me to wish they just go off somewhere and die. I guess I realized that God loves them just as much as He loves me even though they act like jerks. When I drank and when I was getting sober early on I was a jerk for sure. And I also used to cut off people a lot too. Somebody must have prayed for me to get here alive - so now I look at that as a job I can do for others too.

Sorry this is so long but one more thing - this is something God kinda spoke to me. What would happen if that jerk (any jerk that gets me mad) didnt have anyone praying for him? He would be without a prayer. I wouldnt want to ever be without a prayer in front of God. So its a lot easier now to pray for those that I dont like AND be "cheerful".
    Thank you so much for the enlightening inspiration on resentments. I have been praying for others but "not feeling" it in my heart. That brings great reality to praying for others and be grateful to my HP! :D

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