- Clancy’s Seven Questions

Clancy’s Seven Questions




Discussions related to Sponsors, Sponsoring, Working with others,

Clancy’s Seven Questions

Postby Dallas » Sat Jul 30, 2005 6:21 pm

Clancy’s Seven Questions

Guilt, Resentment, Fear, Inadequacy, Loneliness: The five areas that seem to cause the most serious problems for people in recovery.

Several years ago, Clancy I., was explaining to me that guilt, resentment, fear, feelings of personal inadequacy and loneliness were the five areas that seem to cause the most serious problems for people in recovery.

He shared with me seven questions that he uses to help a person start writing and he emphasised that the questions and the writing are not intended to replace A.A.’s Step 4, they just help the person get started.

Most of the people who approach Clancy or are referred to him, are very hardcore cases who have tried numerous times and approaches to solve their problems.

I have been using these “Seven Questionsâ€
Last edited by Dallas on Thu Nov 10, 2005 11:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Dallas
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Is it Time to Move On?

Postby Rusty Zipper » Wed Aug 10, 2005 6:35 pm

hello all. seeing that this is the section on sponsership. there may be no better place to talk about this subject. two day's ago, my sponser of almost 2-1/2 years say's to me. Patrick. maybe it's time you get a new sponser. well let me tell you i was shocked. he said, get off the f#@$%ng Pink Cloud... i was told by a couple of people with major long term sobriety,and someone near, and dear to us on this site. do not let anyone try to push you off your cloud. i do not want to share details. that would tend to make any response oppionated. what i can share is that this has not been the first time that i was told get off the cloud. most of this stems from two opposing view's at recovery, and life. to keep it simple. it's black and white thinking vs grey! i'm the grey thinker? my sponser was just the right person, at the right place, at the right time. to lead me to one day sober, to one month sober to 90 day's, to one year , to two year's, and to now. we bang our heads about recovery. i try to tell him that my Pink Cloud is just the fog lifting from many years of using. and that its really just putting Step 3 into propper use on a daily basis. i allway's say that in any sittuation there are now three way's to see it. this way, that way, and the other way we never thought about. the Power Greater Than's way. he just keeps saying i,m delusional i'm not living in reality, i'm in a fairy tale. i say sorry that you feel that way, and try to remain humble, and not have to try to prove my point... right, or sober? later that night he did call, and said that he appologized to the people that were there when the outburst happened. and to appolgize to me. earlier that night i tried to talk to him, but he said no. after i did manage to get his ear a moment i said that you were mean, and destrutive to me. and said if you want to talk about it we may. well the next conversation went well until another black and white issue vs grey came up. yup, you got it. off to the race's again. we have not spoken for two day's. i have spoken to my potentional new sponser. he is someone i have always exchanged thought's with from almost day one. has long term sobriety, no Pink Cloud lol, but has a real even view about life, and recovery. now what's breaking my heart is my loyalty facter to my sponser, you know what i mean? i have prayed on this, meditatted on it, played cat, and mouse with it . and i know i have to make a deccision about this. i want to grow even more,, not be held back by someone elses view on recovery and life. do i stay, or do i go. i was never very good at making a deccision on thing's. hey, another reason why i D & Dr'g. you should see me at a dinner. way to many choices? lol... so here's where Rusty's at for roday. i thought by writing this an answer might come. "NOT" more work to be done. good wish's xoxo Rusty.............ps... well hold onto that Pink Cloud Rusty. as i'm previewing this letter. a young man of about 16, or 17 herd me tell my story at the Hospital IOP. he has just been coming around the room's for a couple of day's. he just called me and asked me to sponser him!!! amazing, simply amazing. bless the Power That Be
Rusty Zipper
 
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Location: My Room in CT.

Postby Dallas » Wed Aug 10, 2005 7:43 pm

Hey Rusty!!! Glad to hear from you. Missed you the last couple of days so I knew you were up to something! As always, it’s a pleasure to hear from you and your Pink Cloud!!!

Naturally, since I’m not your sponsor, I won’t give you any suggestions on your sponsor!!! If I was, I could tell you to go ahead and fire me!!! :lol:

I believe that I’ve gotten to know you reasonably well over the last few months, and that’s why I’ll say this: I believe that deep down inside, you already know the right answer to your question. And, the One that you need to be asking is your Higher Power, God… that’s who you turned your will and life over to, right?

Now, how do you know the answers you get are coming from God or Rusty? I don’t know the answer to that, because I’m not Rusty. :lol: … and, I’m not smart enough myself to know if my own answers to my questions are coming from me… or from God…. Because I’m not-God. That’s why I use the Big Book to get my answers and to validate any answers that I get from anywhere. My first AA sponsor taught me that.

He said “I’m not-God, and you are not-God… therefore, if I ever tell you something that you can’t back up with the Big Book… just disregard what I told you because it isn’t worth remembering!â€
Dallas
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Postby Rusty Zipper » Wed Aug 10, 2005 8:56 pm

Dallas, yet again you are one of the miricals in my new life. wadd'a ya sittin on here waiting for me.? lmasso. rotfl. lol! you have helped me to strength'n my new belief's yet again. i have to let go, just like when i turned my life over to a careing loving God. i know that i will be doing this for the right reason's. and should i fall, only i will pay the price. as has been said before, we both know that if we fall, it's death. i cant afford to be playing the "Who know's the Most" and doesn't know ####. i am happy, i want to stay happy. and even with all the crap, and the crap i can most of the times smile at. because i can now see my old way's. i can imagine how the old Rusty would have reacted to a situation. Dallas i like what you say about the therory of the BB. it makes sence in this know it all program. sorry i dont mean it as it sound's. i mean the know it all's that go out of the room's and come back boo- hoo'n about the litle problem's... give me the people that are dying from cancer, and are dying with grace, and can still put a smile on our face's... right now i can feel an attitude a brewin. Dallas, when i pulled up your reply, i read it and cryed. cryed tears of grattitude that i am not just sober, that i am happy, helping other's, and have faith... Dallas, my sobriety brother, and may i call you my online sponser,lol... oop's hear's that deffiance again. well if the BB were written now, i wonder what it would have to say about this??? bless you Dallas, and all the wonderfull people at STEP 12..... maybe sponserless in CT. :roll: xoxo Rusty :wink:
Rusty Zipper
 
Posts: 371
Joined: Fri Jul 29, 2005 11:19 pm
Location: My Room in CT.

Postby Dallas » Thu Aug 11, 2005 7:57 pm

RZ, you said,

and should i fall, only i will pay the price. as has been said before, we both know that if we fall, it's death


That’s only true if you drink when you fall…. Life lets us make mistakes. Heck, Life needs something to laugh at! But, Life is very forgiving! Alcoholism is not forgiving though… that’s why it’s more tragic if we drink when we fall! Alcohol will put us on the ground and we’ll be yelling “Help!!! I’ve fallen, and I can’t get up!!!â€
Dallas
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Posts: 4781
Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2005 9:05 pm
Location: Fort Smith, Arkansas USA


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