But... but, but, but.... we're trying to be kind!
Now. For me... that's progress!!!
I was always a kind little kid. Hyper-sensitive, too.
After my feelings got hurt so bad -- I couldn't handle the emotional pain, so I turned to being an anger-monger (later, when I grew up more). Because, later, my feeling still hurt. And, I had to act as if I was real tough... because "a real man" would never have hurt feelings!!!
After getting sober and taking the Steps -- it wasn't hard to be kind -- most of the time. But, I still had some spells that would resurface from time to time. I realized those were resurfacing because I would get away from the daily growth Steps... 10 through 12.
Now, I know what the problem is BEFORE I get disturbed... It's always the same... I haven't been doing the daily stuff that keeps me straightened out. So I try. And, try and try. And, sometimes, for a while I can consistently do it. But, it takes help.
This is why I have a sponsor. I need an authority figure in my life that I will consider what they say -- more than what I say. Someone that can see through me and see when I'm moving into bs territory. Someone I can check in with and get weighed by. And, someone to tell me what's really going on in my life instead of what I think is going on in my life.
For me, this is using spiritual principles and it works for me.
I can lie to myself and lie to God... and think that I"m getting away with it. But, I know ahead of time -- that I can't like to my sponsor and get away with it. It isn't because he's so smart. It's because I'm trusting God to work through him. Perfect protection in perfect vulnerability.