It's nice to have the freedom to ponder today. Damn to have sobriety and all those other monkies too I guess I can see why they don't work together so great. Gotta stay out of myself and out of my own way
On my first adventure into AA, I thought I had it all together. All I needed to do was just not drink -- and I could manage the world!
I only stayed sober for 5 1/2 months with that idea.
When I got my last chance to get sober again... I decided that it was not only a good idea, but it was necessary... that I re-arrange my priorities in life. Rather than focusing on material resources and money and social life and stuff... I had better figure out how to stay sober for a few 24 hours in a row!
For me, I had to resort to drastic measures. With sobriety being #1 in my life, I sold my business, sold my furniture and just about everything I had, and moved into a little rented one-room guest house -- where I could keep my life really simple. I just wanted a simple roof over my head figuring that this way -- I can focus all my attention on learning to live sober -- and staying sober.
Well, for me, that worked. It helped me get a reasonable foundation underneath me so that I could then move up in life... and rent a room inside someone elses house!
After that, I progressed to where I was able to share a house with someone else... but, that was slow in coming. It took me over two years to get that stable.
Now, I don't suggest that others are as sick as I was, or that they need to resort to the drastic changes that I did -- I simply understand what they mean, when they say "I've got to keep it simple and focus on my sobriety and living sober!" I still keep that as my #1 priority... even though my material situations in life have changed for the better.
For me, sobriety must come first. If I'm sober... I've got a chance to continue to learn to live life sober. And, if I'm sober -- when I do face problems or make mistakes -- I'm better able to be able to do something more intelligent about it.