- I'm not sober and I need a sponsor

I'm not sober and I need a sponsor




Discussions related to Sponsors, Sponsoring, Working with others,

I'm not sober and I need a sponsor

Postby amaezing » Sun Dec 27, 2009 11:47 pm

I have been to a few meetings and i like what i hear. i am eager and scared at the same time. need that big shove and a " atta girl"
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Postby Dallas » Mon Dec 28, 2009 5:02 am

I understand. :lol: Sounds to me like you're in the right place!

I don't sponsor anyone that isn't sober. I usually only 12 Step them, help them sober up and get out from under the fog, and try to hook them up with someone else after they're sober. I'm too tough on sponsees... and they tend to get their feelings hurt when I sponsor them, so I'd rather keep them as an AA friend and let someone else sponsor them.

My sponsor is tough as nails with me so that's really the only way that I know how to do it... in a way that worked for me. However, there is no shortage of those that will give you the atta girl that you need. Most AA's are pretty friendly, outgoing, and go out of their way to be nice. So, there isn't much to be afraid of, other than afraid of what it will feel like once you get sober. For me, it sucked when I first got sober... but, as time went on, and I did some suggested work, it finally got pretty good! I recommend it! It's been great for me!

Glad to see you here. I hope you'll keep coming back and keep us company!

Dallas
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Postby Tim » Mon Dec 28, 2009 9:19 pm

Dallas wrote:I don't sponsor anyone that isn't sober. I usually only 12 Step them, help them sober up and get out from under the fog, and try to hook them up with someone else after they're sober. I'm too tough on sponsees... and they tend to get their feelings hurt when I sponsor them, so I'd rather keep them as an AA friend and let someone else sponsor them.

My sponsor is tough as nails with me so that's really the only way that I know how to do it... in a way that worked for me. However, there is no shortage of those that will give you the atta girl that you need. Most AA's are pretty friendly, outgoing, and go out of their way to be nice. So, there isn't much to be afraid of, other than afraid of what it will feel like once you get sober. For me, it sucked when I first got sober... but, as time went on, and I did some suggested work, it finally got pretty good! I recommend it! It's been great for me!

Dallas


Dallas--If you had sponsored me when I first attempted to get sober, maybe I'd have stayed sober. Except that when I first attempted to get sober, you weren't sober then either.

Oh well, many of us take more than one attempt to get sober and stay continuously sober. My Higher Power is a God of second chances....and third and fourth and....
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Postby Dallas » Wed Dec 30, 2009 12:48 am

:lol: :lol: Thanks for the kind comments, Tim.
And, I understand... It took me two AA attempts to get it.

Thank God, for all the chances that He provides to us!

When I say two attempts... I guess that isn't right.

For almost five months after my first failed attempt, I tried over and over and over and over so many times that if I counted all those times... I wouldn't know how many there were... showing up at meetings half drunk hoping for some kind of miracle to happen. The miracle didn't happen until I hit my knees harder than I had ever hit them -- and begged God to please help me, and promised that if He would help me... I was willing to do ANYTHING to try and stay sober. :wink:

And, He made me keep my promise over and over and over again! :lol:

Dallas
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Postby tim-one » Wed Dec 30, 2009 8:27 am

Thanks, Mazin'.

Here ya go- ATAGIRL! (shove)

Next meeting you go to, TELL THEM you need help stopping. If they don't know, they can't help you. They know you can't stop by yourself. Someone there is willing to surround you while you stop.

If they don't volunteer, don't give up. Go to another group until you find one that actually works step 12.

It's up to you. Want it? Get it.

I feel for you. 12 years ago I went into detox. Couldn't stop on my own. Went from there into AA. I went to a meeting every day ... for a while.

For some reason, I just never heard the part about getting a Higher Power and a sponsor and WORKING the steps. All I heard was power and sponsor - sounded like NASCAR to me.

Somehow I stayed sober 2 years that way. BUT it got me again.

About 5 year ago I wanted to stop drinking again. I remembered feeling better back then. Life still sucked because I didn't DO the program. I remembered AA and started going to meetings drunk. I just couldn't get it.

I never TOLD anyone I was there to stop drinking and needed help. They tolerated my presence and kept saying, "keep comin' back". Such patient people.

Finally, last Christmas, I decided to check into rehab - just couldn't do it myself and needed close attention to ... like ... NOT DIE.

This time I payed attention, got a sponsor, worked the steps, stay connected and involved. Today, I'm quite comfortably sober. I also know that the only way to stay comfortably sober is to stay with the program and never get slack.

I thought "AA doesn't work." Turns out it was ME who didn't work. I'm working now. And AA is working. Piece o'pie. Easy as cake.

So, I suggest you go to a meeting and say it outloud infronta God and everybody - "I NEED HELP! SOMEBODY SPONSOR ME! PUHLEEEEZE!"

It's up to you. If you want it, grab it. Nobody is going to pour it down your throat. Sharpen your elbows and get close to sober people. Beg if you have to. It's that important.

I love that you expressed your willingness here. Just say that to flesh and blood people. You'll get the help you need.

You go, girl! I mean it ... GO. And keep coming back. :wink:

Love,
Tim1
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