Hell--looo Missy, and welcome to the show
My name is Anne, and I am an alcoholic.
When I first come into the program, I heard 'get a sponsor', so I gotta sponsor...I was willing to go to any length. Wellll, this lady comes over with a written out list of instructions, I was to do things her
way, I was to talk to no one else but her, listen to no one else but her, and the BB was just an example only
, do the steps her
way. I wasn't to talk to any of the guys in the group, wasn't even supposed to associate with them. She attached herself to me my very first meein', it'd been 4 days since my last drink, n I was still drunk/hungover, a shakin' down crawlin' mess. My head--heck, my whole upper body felt as though I had a sledge hammer around my neck---n this woman was 'bout to---well, ya'll get the drift. We all went to a local hangout after the meetin', that group was big on fellowship--it was cool. The guys were over at their own table watchin' a hockey game...I couldn't see it cuz my vision was still quite blurry (to say the least)...'n this parrot of a woman is natterin' in my ear. Next thing I know, this humungous piece of black forest cake gets plunked down in front-a me...my eyes went big, I sat up..don't know when the last time I ate was. The waitress said this was from the guys...this woman picks up this plate n goes to hand it back to the waitress...I tell ya...that woman near lost her arm...I didn't care if Jack the Ripper sent it to me. Well...some months go by, n I'm still thinkin' this woman knows AA, right. She did-for better for worse-keep me sober. I started listenin' to these guys in the group, 'n how Rusty was sayin'...when it strikes the right chords...when it punches ya in the gut..n ya completely relate to what that person's sayin'...there's somethin' 'bout that. In that group, there was the 3 of 'em, 'n one of 'em asked me...'bout 6 months sober I was...asks me how it's goin'..I says "Some women'll make ya drink," In otherwords..I still had this..uh...what's that word??--oh..ya...attitude
, he asks me what all was goin' on, how the steps were goin' 'n I told him...'n he says, "ya know...you can
fire your sponsor,"...told me a few other things...but most important thing he said was...it helps to pray about a sponsor before hand, 'n when the 'right' person comes along, ya'll will know it. Don't just pick one to pick one...it's been my experience, 'n I've seen it, too...there are those 'cling-ons', too...who mean well, but might just make ya think that's the way it is, 'n if that's the way it is, ya might not want it...even at that though, those ones are good temp sponsors, cuz, even after all this time...that woman was there, she dealt with me when I just as soon kick in every door I passed just cuz the thought crossed my head, 'n there was stuff that she said that today, I think back 'n go, "Oooo-oh, now I know what she was goin' on 'bout." But, the program/BB way is the way to go. Thanks for lettin' me ramble 'n ramble...'n ramble. I don't stop in for a number of weeks..this is what happens. Just take it easy...don't rush things, 'n all will fall into place. Anne.