- DUI

DUI




Help for alcohol abuse addiction alcoholics who want to stay sober

DUI

Postby Y » Fri Feb 12, 2010 10:12 pm

Can you share your DUI experiences?

What can I expect to happen to me?

I live in Utah.

Y
Last edited by Y on Sat Feb 13, 2010 5:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Y
 
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Postby Dallas » Sat Feb 13, 2010 2:36 am

Hello Y, welcome to the forum! I hope that you find something here that will be helpful to you.

What's going to happen next? The same thing that happens to all of us that have been in your similar shoes:

1. We'll keep doing what we're doing, try harder to change for the better, and watch things get progressively worse.

Or,

2. Seek and get help -- that comes from outside of ourselves and outside of our thinking about what can make things better.

I believe that you are in the right place at the right time -- being here. I don't think it's a coincidence that you just happen to find us. I believe that there is a Power that is greater than you, and me, and all of us combined together... that cares about you and want's to help you.

My hope is: That you'll stick around and snoop around for a little while... sniff things out and decide to try giving the solution that has helped us -- a try. It certainly can't hurt you any more than you're hurting yourself.

We care about you because we identify with you. When we say "We understand" -- we really do. Most of us have been where you're at now... and many of us... kept trying #1 above... I sure did! And, sure enough... things got worse.

It wasn't until I was willing to give up trying to give it my best - - and try a best that was working for others -- that it started to get better.

I wish you the best and I'm here, as well as many others are here, that are willing to help you.

Best regards,

Dallas B.
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DUI

Postby Y » Sat Feb 13, 2010 2:42 pm

Dallas.

Thank you for your kind note.

Isn't there any other reader on this forum that has had a DUI? Surely, I cannot be the only one?

Can anyone, share what happened with their DUIs?

Y
Y
 
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Joined: Fri Feb 12, 2010 9:58 pm
Location: Salt Lake City, Utah

Postby Dallas » Sat Feb 13, 2010 9:02 pm

I had a couple of them... but they were more than 23 years ago and I know they are much tougher now than they were then.

I've sponsored some alkies that have had DUI's. Most of them had a few of them before I sponsored them. In regards to what is going to happen next, in your case, it would be best for you to speak with an attorney. They will know the laws in your area and they will know the attitudes of the judges there.

Where I'm living now, first offense, it's usually a fine of around a thousand dollars and probation, and depending on the BAC, Blood Alcohol Content level, if it's very much over the limit, they may or may not have to do a few days in jail, sometimes, they can do it on weekends, and/or they can do community service, and their driving privileges are restricted. They may include the "drunk driving classes" (expensive) and may require a certain number of AA meetings to attend, where they get court cards signed.

Again, when you're dealing with the law -- you want to talk to lawyers! If you can't afford one, try calling the Public Defender's Office and see if they can help or at least answer your questions.

Second & third offenses... are much more punishing. In some areas, a second or third offense gets treated as a felony, jail sentences get longer, fines get higher, driving suspensions and revocations get longer, cars can be taken away, driver's license can get taken away permanently, and/or they can make you install a blow-device that monitors your blood alcohol level to be able to start your car (these are very expensive).

4th, 5th, 6th, 7th offenses??? Yep. When alcoholism kicks in... alcoholics will find a way to get those too! And, they do!

Once upon a time, I could go with the sponsee to court, talk to the prosecutor and judge, if the alkie was serious about recovery -- and it would seem to help. Now, they go by strict sentencing guidelines and it very seldom seems to do any good.

Again, speak with a lawyer. That's the best suggestion I can make.

Regardless of what you do, you'll have to face it. Some slick lawyers can get people off... and often, those people just go back to drinking and driving after leaving the court house.

In regards to employment... that's unique, too. Some people lose their job and some don't. The one's that do get fired and have to look for another job -- the driving offense shows up on their record, most often, for the rest of their life... And, it can also prevent you from getting employed in certain occupations.

I've known many alkies that have came to AA, got sober, got serious about their sobriety and recovery -- and totally re-created their lives for the better. But, they've still had to face their problems and pay the piper for their dances with trouble. We all have to do that -- if we want to stay sober.

Best regards,

Dallas B.
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dui

Postby knny913 » Sat Feb 13, 2010 11:13 pm

Hi y,
The best I can offer you are suggestions for a better life without alcohol.
If you are looking for legal advice, I cannot give that to you, I know here in Colorado the 1st offense is valued at around $10 grand. My last offense in '02 cost me around $900.00, people in my dui classes said I got off really lucky. As I said I cannot offer you legal advice, but if you want to face your drinking problem (if you think you have one), I'll be able to discuss that with you.

Good Luck in you indeaver,
I'm here for you spiritually,
Kenny
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Postby DiggerinVA » Tue Feb 16, 2010 5:20 pm

A lot of what happens depends on the state you live in. legally that is.

In VA where I live. You have to enter a Alcohol Safety course. As well as face some sort of jail time (based on BAC). You can have a suspended license allowing you to go too and from work, they want you working; they also allow you to drive to complete the Alcohol safety course. Now the real kicker, to complete the Safety course you have to be drug and alcohol free for a year.

Now one of the things they try and teach you, besides BAC effects, is if you are an alcoholic.

Now when I got mine I chose the 1st option given by Dallas. I figured out after drinking through the year of abstinence and I got my license back. That I could not drive across town with out the risk of getting drunk, I was an Alcoholic. Then the odyssey began.
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DUI

Postby Y » Wed Feb 17, 2010 10:39 pm

Thank you for your comments.

I have been attending meetings every day since last Friday and have found much comfort in hearing people speak about being sober.

I've been a mess--can't sleep, cry all the time and want to die. But, that would be too easy. And HOW can I hurt my 15-year-old daughter by signing out of this life by my own hand.

I reached out and asked a lawyer I know for some free advice.

It's not going to be easy--my BAC was 1.7. I am looking at some jail time and a $1300 fine. My license will be suspended for 120 days.

So here I am in Utah--jobless, soon-to-be carless and will pay for my stupidity.

I could have done some many different things that night--but chose the EVIL way out by driving. I am thankful I didn't kill someone.

I was doing so well too--had stopped smoking pot two months earllier--drastically reduced my drinking--BUT as I have learned from my new friends at AA--one drink is too many--and a million not enough.

Thanks again for your support.

Your addicted alcoholic sister in Utah,

Y
Last edited by Y on Thu Feb 18, 2010 5:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby butch » Thu Feb 18, 2010 7:59 am

Y
Just take it a day at a time and remember, life sucks, but its a lot better when sober. Your Higher Power will help you through all of your problems if you let HIM. This too shall pass and if you are sober you will enjoy life on lifes terms and find out that it can even be fun. :lol:

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DUI

Postby Y » Thu Feb 18, 2010 9:10 am

Butch, DiggerVA, Kinny and Dallas,

Thanks.

I've always been so proud of my education, looks and status. I would always say--I am not like my brother Bill--the drunk..

But I AM like my brother Bill--maybe I don't drink a 5th a day-but didn't drink like normal people, i.e., a glass of wine vs. a bottle.

What I am trying to come to terms with is WHY am I so self-destructive?

WHY?

To desend from where I was to where I am now is terrifying.

And my anger at myself keeps growing--can't forgive myself.

BUT--I do not want to drink. My shame/anger overpowers whatever craving that is lurking in me.

I WILL get a job--reclaim my life.

How can I find a sponsor? I am too ashamed to tell the folks at AA about myself. Can't make myself stand in line for hugs and chips. Can't make myself get up there. Just cry during the meetings--BUT I feel better being there.

I can't kill myself and don't like living..


Y
Last edited by Y on Thu Feb 18, 2010 5:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Feb 12, 2010 9:58 pm
Location: Salt Lake City, Utah

Postby Dallas » Thu Feb 18, 2010 1:13 pm

Thanks for sharing Y. I appreciate you so much -- and someday, if you stay sober -- you'll know why I so appreciate Y!

The fact is: It could have been much worse. And, it could have been much worse -- forever. At least you think of your daughter's heart and what she would have to live through without you. And, I'm sure that many others would be hurting without you.

Yesterday is history. It's the past. Accept it. Learn from it. Pay for it. And, then you can let it go -- and live a wonderful life in sobriety, creating a life that is better than anything that you've accomplished so far!

I thought sober people were nuts when they said things like that to me. My thoughts were "You just don't understand! You don't know all the things that I've succeeded in doing! You don't know where I've been, what I've been, and what I've achieved!"

On the other side of that... I didn't think about "Uh-oh! They don't know the bad stuff either!" :lol:

The life I have now -- in sobriety -- I wouldn't trade for all my past successes even if they were multiplied by a hundred! I know what it is like to have peace of mind. To be really happy -- and not depend on anything or anyone else to be happy. I no longer have fears of financial insecurity. I no longer feel useless. I have a host of good friends all over the world -- and many of them -- I haven't even met them yet!

And, you, too... can have all that I have now... and you'll probably be able to multipy my good life by a hundred -- and find that your's will even be better than mine -- sober!

Keep coming back. Join in with us as we trudge this road of Happy Destiny together. I guarantee you -- you'll be glad that you did!

Dallas
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