Do you start with the serenity prayer?

Discussions related to 12 Step Sponsors, 12 Step Sponsoring, Working with others using the 12 Steps, for AA's, NA's, Al-Anons, Nar-Anons, OA, and others using the 12 Steps.
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Do you start with the serenity prayer?

Postby diggityDawg » Tue Mar 02, 2010 5:44 pm

Just curious if anyone has a ritual for how they begin sessions with their sponsees? I don't mean getting together to hang out, but "official" step work. Do you start with the serenity prayer? The Promises? How It Works? Nothing at all? Maybe I should make this a poll... I've always done the serenity prayer, since that's what my sponsor did.


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Postby Dallas » Tue Mar 02, 2010 7:39 pm

Hello Eddie,

My suggestion is: if this is the way that your sponsor passed it on to you, and you feel comfortable with it and it has worked for you -- to continue doing it the way that it was passed on to you.

With each person that you asked you might get a different answer from each person.

My sponsor is a real hardball get-to-the-point kind of guy. That's the way he sponsors. He sponsors many men. And, many of the men that he sponsors sponsor many men. I sponsor few... because I sponsor like I've been sponsored. And, most men that want to be powder-puffed don't like a hardball get-to-the-poin kind of sponsor. I seem to run into more of the powder-puff Charmin kind of guys. :lol:

I needed a sponsor precisely like the one I've got. That's what worked for me. A powder-puff sponsor would have returned to drinking with a sponsee like me. :lol:

Sometimes, you want to get on the same level as the person you're working with. If they are the praying type, you might want to start with a prayer. I personally say my prayers before I meet with the guy. I keep my conversations with God and the request for guidance and direction from God -- with God and myself. I would be hesitant to start off with a prayer with an alkie for a few reasons:

a. Most of them have had preachers and church people that prayed with them and powder puffed them -- and it didn't work for them. Or, they get suspicious "what's this guy trying to sell me now?"

b. My Ego. I don't want to impress some alkie with how spiritual or religious I might be and then have his expectations of me so high that as soon as I sneeze -- it gives him a reason to give up.

I try to be who I am and to be true to who I am. And, that works for me and hopefully, it will work for the other guy.

Alkies are pros when it comes to being camelions. Those little lizards that change the color of their skins to suit the moments purpose. I find it best to stay in my own skin and then I show some consistency.

Best regards to you. It's a great question!

Dallas B.

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Postby diggityDawg » Wed Mar 03, 2010 12:18 pm

GREAT answer Dallas, thanks for giving such a thoughtful answer!

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