Dallas wrote:A long-time married to an Al-Anon, brother in sobriety once told me... "It's more important to be happy than right!" ... Once I began taking action on Bob's suggestion in all my relationships, business and personal... ALL my relationships improved and my life got better!
I have seen it over and over and over again over the years. Very rarely, do we hear of a family member being successful at helping another family member. It doesn't work. They need to find someone else to help them and to sponsor them. Trying to help them, based upon my own personal experiences and those I've watched... most often makes the situation worse.
Neither my uncle (my dad's youngest brother) nor I accepted the AA program until last fall. We both had been white-knuckling it for the last 5 or so years. In September I went back to AA and in November, he crawled back as well. My dad passed away to a better place on Feb. 29, 2008 (yep, and he was known to be a jokester!). It wasn't until a year and a half later or so that we surrrendered to God and went back to the AA program. I know my dad had been praying for us to get help. I found out that my uncle was back in AA and I called him. We talked for about 45 minutes, the most ever. I told him I never felt so close to my dad than I do now and feel his presence and think about him in every meeting I go to. He said the same. My relationship with my dad has been restored thanks to AA (and my wife wonders why I look so forward to making my meetings!!) When I wake up the day I know I'm going to a meeting, I can't wait for it to get here and no matter what happens throughout the day, I'm in tunnel vision and can see the light. I'm also less affected by the day's little traumas. It is truly a miracle, a Christ-incidence that I am finding my way again and feel like my dad is up there still helping me out.