- How Do You Say Goodbye

How Do You Say Goodbye




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How Do You Say Goodbye

Postby gunner48 » Thu Jul 15, 2010 6:44 am

My friend Robert passed away Tuesday morning. I am feeling a lose I have never had before in my 21 years in this program. Here is why
In Feb 1991 a man walked into my home group in Galena Park Tx . He looked as if he had just fell out of a HOBO's ass. Dirty and all the smells that go with it. His name was Robert G. I liked him from that moment on. We began a friendship that for 19 plus years just grew and grew. I think he and I became test dummies for Gods Love. He was the first person I ever cared about, you see when I got here there was nothing in me that was capable of caring for another person. We learned to laugh together, we cried together and we learned rule 62 together. We grew, me about 30 pounds and Robert about 60. We ate Mexican food for lunch each day and learned how mad the owners wife was by how hot the dipping sauce was that day.WE laughed. WE went to AA conventions and sat in the lobbies talking to as many people as we could and again we laughed. He picked my wife for me because he said I needed someone with Beautiful legs. We laughed. He came to my home to marry his wife. When the Judge started he shock like a dog passing a peach seed and we laughed. When my father passed he parked his 18 wheeler in Indiana caught a plane and came to Houston to make sure I was OK and after the funeral we gathered and laughed. When he was ill earlier this year and last ,I went back to Houston and spent some time with him and yes again we laughed. I had the honor of watching his grand children grow and he mine. They never saw either of us drink. We got to see 2 very hardened hearts soften and become whole again. We talked about taking the limitations off God that we put there and allow Gods love to get through.
Yes he was the test dummie of Gods love in my life. So if today you hear a loud BOOMING voice filled with laughter it just may be Robert cutting up with God.
Thank You Robert for being my friend. I will always love you and will miss you until once again God allows us to sit and laugh at ourselves and enjoy each others company.

Peace and Love
Gunner
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Postby Tim » Thu Jul 15, 2010 10:09 am

Gunner--Thanks for sharing this wonderful tribute to your friend, Robert. May your memories of all that he meant to you comfort you in your grief over his loss.
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Postby Dallas » Thu Jul 15, 2010 3:13 pm

Sorry to hear of the loss Gunner. I lost another one of the AA Bob's in my life about a year and a half ago, and I understand. When I read Chapter 11, A Vision For You -- for me, it describes our experience of the friends that we make in this deal. How they become like closer than family to us. And, it isn't easy when we have to let them go. The one wonderful thing that we have is the many memories of our times together. The fun and laughter. The helping each other and being there for each other. The kids. And, sometimes the Grand kids. We remember the miracle of sobriety for the both of us. And, probably the grandest of things -- is, that they lived to the end -- sober.

I'm always at a loss of words when others experience a loss. I do know how painful it is -- but, I never know another man or womans feelings. However, when it comes to losing one of our AA buddys -- that, I can seem to understand a little better than I can when it's a non-AA friend or relative.

Thanks for sharing with us Gunner. And, thanks for your friendship. I appreciate you.

Dallas
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Postby gunner48 » Thu Jul 22, 2010 12:31 am

I want to thank all of my AA friends for the love shown me after the passing of Robert. We have laughed and cried together and once again made it through a hard time together. Gods grace has come through. Again from the bottom oh my heart Thank You

Peace and Love
Gunner
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Postby Dallas » Thu Jul 22, 2010 8:29 pm

Thank you, John. I appreciate you.
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Postby Bensober » Tue Jul 27, 2010 10:33 am

Hey Gunner,
Just saw this post. Wanna thank you again for all the support you gave me with my brother "Danny". Danny's still alive but because of the stroke and what has happened, in a way a old part of our relationship has died.

What a wonderful tribute you wrote to your friend. You and he were always there for eachother. I do know when I'm grieving the one thing that helps me pull through is when I focus on the love I feel for the person. Love never stops. Love is always good. This keeps me in a more positive space about the loss.

These AA relationships have forced my heart to be soft too Gunner! If my heart would have stayed hard there is no way I'd a been able to stay sober. Keep surrendering to your love for Robert Gunner...he's a part of all of us now.

God Bless My Friend,

Ben H.
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