Almost 4 months sober

[PeaceJoy]

Hi, I am almost 4 months sober. May 7th was my AA sobriety date. I am 39 yr married mother of 3 teenagers. I am daughter to a wonderful mother who is dying from cirrhosis of the liver. I am her caregiver 3 to 4 days per week (24 hr days) and watching how this cunning, powerful, baffling disease finally takes a person's life is an eye opener for me. It makes me so glad I accepted my own disease and join AA. Taking that first step was very humbling but I'm so glad I did!

Because I go between home, part time job, and my mother's home in another town, I am having a hard time getting to as many meetings as I feel I need. A forum like this might be a source of info and support.

I look forward to getting to know you fellow AAs.


PeaceJoy~

[butch]

May He ease your mothers final days. This disease is truly awful and is so patient too. The disease cannot win if we stay connected with God and this program on a daily basis. This forum will help you when you can't find time for a meeting. There is so many good thoughts and suggestions here that i can not take it all in at one time.

I pray for serenity and peace for both of you!

Butch

[PeaceJoy]

Thanks Butch. The cirrhosis truly is a patient and horrible disease. She looks like she is 9 months pregnant with twins. Her body (other than abdomen) is skin and bones. Sometimes her ankles swell up to a horrible size but when she doesn't drink or eat salt it makes a big difference on the ankles. Her abdomen swelling will never go down, even if she quits drinking.She bruises really bad. Blood doesn't clot right. Now she's getting slightly confused. She itches all over REALLY bad and it's because of the liver shutting down. She had a blood transfusion a week ago and that helped. It's just like plugging holes in a boat. We get one thing under control and another gets worse. Ugghh She is only 59 too.

But today I chose not to drink. For 24 hours I will stay sober. I have the day off so I am meeting my sponsor in another town and we're hitting a new meeting.

PeaceJoy~

[Dallas]

Welcome to the forum PeaceJoy! It's great to have you here with us.

Sorry to hear your mothers experiences. That's got to be horrible to go through. Also, I relate w/ you, as to being a caregiver. I did it for 13 yrs, with my mother and it sure wasn't easy. I admire you -- I sure couldn't have done it at seven months sober! And, it was difficult on many occasions even with a few years sober! So, my heart and thoughts are with you. I understand.

I read your other messages but was holding off on a reply until I got to this one. I sensed that I was not reading them in the order they were posted. And, I'm only on my first cup of coffee! It was a late morning.

Periodically -- I, too, have a drunk dream. And, I sure don't like it when I do. I take them as reminders and alerts. They remind me that I'm alcoholic and one drink is too many and a thousand would not be enough. Also, I use them as motivators to check my behavior, my thinking, any new activities that I've started, and any new friends that I've made. I also use them to help me seek more spiritual progress, humility, and a closer relationship to the Fellowship.

Thanks for your sharing and participation on the site! I've enjoyed reading from you and I look forward to reading more and getting to know you.

Best wishes for the best of the best of the best for you!

Dallas

[PeaceJoy]

I'm over in my home away from home (taking care of mom with chirrosis) and I'm taking the necessary break and going to a new meeting today. It's new to me........not NEW. I think it annoys my mom because she is anti-AA. But this is for me and not about her. I assured her I won't mention her name at the meeting, of course.

PeaceJoy~

[Dallas]

Wishing the best for you.

[PeaceJoy]

It was a GREAT meeting. A bunch of people packed into a little tiny worn-out room. A "rough" looking crowd, but when they opened their mouths I heard so much wisdom. It's amazing when a mix of people from all walks of life come together in AA. I think I'll go back to that meeting tomorrow.

Today I am sober. Today I am peaceful.

PeaceJoy~

[Dallas]

Nice to hear from you this morning PeaceJoy! You made my day!

Isn't it funny -- to be sitting in the rooms and suddenly have that silent thought "Thank God these people are sober!!! Gees! I'd be in a world of trouble to be in the same room w/ a few of them before -- and A.A. and God has turned these big tough bruisers into a bunch of warm little puppies inside!" And, I feel so safe, secure and grateful to be sitting in the middle of the pack with them!

Dallas

[november6]

Yeah those little beat up rooms are often my favorite as far as finding pearls of wisdom or things that really get to me.. I dont know why that is.. Im glad you found a place you love:)