Daily Check-In

[sunlight]

There are many prayers for your mom, PeaceJoy. The fellowship here in Denver is with you.

And prayers & positive vibes also for your new job!
May the "Force" be with you!

Thank you all for sharing. Brings some warmth to this below zero day here!

[Dallas]

Mom has not been able to accept that there is a power greater than herself.

When I read that -- it spun up a memory of mine, when I was having trouble accepting that there was any power greater than me -- other than gravity -- and I was always defying that, too!

Then, one day I was doing some serious thinking while drinking, and trying to figure out the how and why those "less-than-me's" in AA could get sober and stay sober and I couldn't!

That was when I discovered that my drinking was a Power Greater than myself! Hmmmm... maybe... that's what those AA's had been trying to say to me in regards to "alcohol-ism"????

Up to that time, I had only been aware of them talking to me about a Higher Power, or Power Greater than myself -- in relationship to some kooky ideas about GOD!

I then, starting thinking along the lines of "Okay. So... maybe, just may be... I've created a Problem that's greater than me -- which means I'll be forced to find a Solution that's greater than the Problem! And, if I can find a Solution that's greater than the Problem -- that will obviously be a Power greater than me!

Then, an AA oldtimer slipped a riddle in my head that bugged the crap out of me! I couldn't stop thinking about it. A simple idea. He said "God, is the application of applied principles." And, that was all he said. He wouldn't discuss it with me and wouldn't answer any of my questions about it. It was like "I just gave you the riddle and the answer to the riddle is in the riddle -- go figure it out for yourself and leave me alone about it!"

Dallas

[Bensober]

Checkin in! Hope your first day went well Peacejoy. Hope you can stay focused with us while your schedule changes. The Mtgs., sisfellowship, this sisfellowship, was given to me the most important relationships I could have. At times I’ve been Twelve Steppin in my physical world here in Fresno, SF, & LA Ca. So have had to put it all in balance. We really do intimate here Peacejoy. There are several of you that if I ever lost would be a great loss in my life. Internet or not…I feel…I love. When I had to unplug my brother from life support this last year, it was interesting because my physical AA support here supported me, but the trauma I was going through I think may have frightened some and even those close to me. My Sponsor was the only one who walked me up to the bedside to unplug him. But he even freaked a little.

Without YOUR support (and I mean this from the bottom of my heart) I would have not made it… I would be drunk and/or dead.

This simple program is really a dicipline. I say this because the "Riddlersâ€

[PeaceJoy]

Good morning brothers and sisters in sobriety. My new job orientation only turned to be paperwork yesterday. Today is more hands-on orientation and I get to meet my clients so it should be good. I don't have to be there until 9 today so I'm relaxing with a cuppa.
Meeting last night and that was one EXCELLENT meeting about the 10th step (which I have not gotten to). One thing that came up was the thinking from some that relapse is part of recovery and almost inevitable. I have to disagree. I refuse to believe that I will relapse. I know it's possible though. I just don't think everyone relapses. What do you all think?

PeaceJoy~

[Dallas]

PeaceJoy, really happy to hear things are looking up & moving up for you!!! Thanks for sharing the good news! I appreciate you.

Dallas

[Bensober]

Checkin in. Yeah Peacejoy relapse…that’s a ongoing deal discussed around these tables. In wworking the Steps and doing all we can do I have seen a lot over the years in that area. After a long period of working the program and then steppin out of the program I relapsed. That’s a no brainer! The lack of defence against the first drink no matter what conciously they were aware of… or “thinkâ€

[sunlight]

This "riddle" is like a Zen koan for me.

If I think about it too much or try to analyze it, my mind grinds to a halt, wrangles into knots and seizes up in spasms, gasping on the floor.

But if I gently let it sink into my waking, walking, working world ( how's THAT for alliteration? ) something clicks and stirs inside. I begin to see and understand on another level, where spiritual awakenings happen.

Then it moves me to get out of "park" or "neutral" and into "drive"!

Pretty trippy.

[PeaceJoy]

You guys are awesome! I guess I am over-analyzing and basically asking for you guys to tell me I won't ever relapse. I will keep in mind that it all hinges on staying in good spiritual condition and taking it one day at a time.

Today was my first full day hands-on at the new job. I have to say it was disappointing to see that all of the employees seem to be very bitter and unhappy and there's a tremendously high turnover rate. None good signs. So I can just hang on there while looking elsewhere for a better position or I can just try to be a spot of sunlight in the middle of darkness. I can hang in there and be a positive addition to the company. Maybe things will improve there. I will pray about it and talk to my sponsors about it. I don't like starting a new job. I like to stay put! My jobs keep ending. Ugghhh


Peacejoy~

[Bensober]

Checking in. Congrats Peacejoy! Welcome to the world of the…Ungrateful, Hard Sufferer’s, Economic Having to Work Anywhare Hardtimers Association! Its really like being in a “dysfunctional dry drunk barâ€

[sunlight]

Good morning brothers and sisters in sobriety!

Let's make this a day that we really carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities.
Then we can LIVE life to the fullest and enjoy the daylights (and nightlights) out of it.

Hey PeaceJoy, just be yourself.
I saw a t-shirt: "Be yourself. Everyone else is taken."
You'll know what to do.

And no, you don't have to relapse!

My son, who has been in so many rehabs that I've lost count, says they teach him relapse is part of recovery. I think they do this so you don't beat yourself up & stop trying.
When I first read the big book and came to the part in More About Alcoholism about the man who drank again because he failed to enlarge his spiritual life, it shook me up. You mean I can't just sit around and look good now that I'm sober?
Nope, not if I want to insure immunity against drinking.

The cool thing about working & self-sacrificing myself for others is that it gives my sobriety a color and flavor that even Baskin Robbins doesn't have! And it takes me places no travel agent could dream of.

Here's to living the sober life!