I don't sponsor guys for the recognition of how great & successful they become, or how active in sharing that they do -- I do it because it keeps me sober! And, my hopes are that they stay sober, too! Heck, if I end up drunk someday -- I hope to have one that I've sponsored to be there to sponsor me!
Some guys really do have a difficult time sharing in meetings. I like being around those types more than I like being around one's that can really flap their lips and sound like a parrot.
I, too, had a difficult time sharing when I was new. And, my sponsor was most often embarrased when I did share! Sometimes, when I'd share, his head would fall towards the table and his hands would cover his head as if he was praying "Oh God! What did I do that was so wrong to deserve this one!"
For real. Not making that up. I guess I just sounded like an idiot when I'd share! And, when I look back on some of my sharing -- I understand! I was kind of nutty to the extreme!
One thing that helped me more than anything to get comfortable was: to get a commitment for a job at the meetings I attended. If I couldn't get them to appoint me to doing something -- I'd appoint myself. I'd get to the meetings early and ask the coffee person to let me help them make the coffee so that I could learn to make the coffee -- just in case I stayed sober long enough to become a coffee person! After we had the coffee brewing I'd see if I could help put out the literature, if they had any. Then, I'd stand at the door, and appoint myself to greet people as they came to the meeting. It gave myself the opportunity to introduce myself to them, to shake their hands, and to get to know the names of the one's that kept coming back. It also helped me -- so that I knew which one's to point the other newcomer's to -- to ask for help! Then, at the end of the meeting, I'd designate myself to be the trash man -- empty the trash, pick up litter. Wipe off the tables. Straighten up the chairs and sweep the floor. Then, I could walk the last person in the meeting, usually the guy or girl w/ the key -- to their car and wish them a good night. It helped me to know they safely got to their car without being bothered. And, once in a while -- it was them, that needed to talk to someone, so we'd head out to a coffee shop and I'd sit there for hours w/ them, listening to them share, or listen to them talk about the problems they were having.
I believe that it was those activities that helped me a lot more than sharing my words of non-wisdom that wasn't going to help anyone and especially wouldn't have helped me to be listening to myself!
Dallas
