- 1st-3rd steps

1st-3rd steps




12 Steps: Discussions related to the 12 Steps and using them as a treatment to recover from alcohol and drug addiction.

1st-3rd steps

Postby Pebbles » Thu Jun 23, 2011 7:58 am

Hi all....I've been sober for 3 years. My husband had been sober for 14, then relapsed this year.
What things boiled down to, was he was involved in a motorcycle vs. auto accident in March 2010, and the process that now has to be gone through has been a battle, none the less. He is ok physically-besides having herniated disks in his neck and back. But mentally...that is the kicker.
I know that people care about what is going on, and worry about our situation, but sometimes their concern makes us think more about us.....and thinking about us is the root of our trouble. People always come up to me and ask "So how is Keith today". It gets to the point where I am always thinking about Keith. And when you get two "sick minds" thinking about him, that's when trouble starts.
So, two days ago, after having to hit a miny bottom concerning my husband, I did the first 3 steps. I admitted that I was powerless over him, I needed help from my higher power, and then I made a decision to turn my husband and his life over to God. And since that point I have felt oh so much better.
All in all folks, alcohol is mentioned only once in the 12 steps-alcohol is only a symptom of my disease. It's me and my thinking that is the problem, and so I need to apply these 12 steps to everything in my life, not just alcohol. That is my experience.....
Thanks for letting me share....
Pebbles
 
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Postby sunlight » Sun Jun 26, 2011 7:55 pm

Happy to hear you're applying the steps to your life. :D

I remember going nuts because of my son, who's an addict & has nearly killed himself 3 times.
I called someone in the program & poured out how I was feeling. This person said, "Sounds like you're having a problem with the first three steps. Where's your powerlessness? Where's your Higher Power? Have you really turned your life and will over to God?"

Wow! I felt like I'd been slapped in the face! But it was a "thanks I needed that" kind of slap. It got me back on track, and now when I find myself headed for the loony bin, I go back to the first three steps. More, if I have a flaming resentment or owe amends.

Thanks for sharing Pebbles. You always make my day.
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Postby Dallas » Wed Aug 03, 2011 1:41 am

Pebbles, your message is a good example of what I think it means to "practice these principles in all my affairs." And, the greatest thing about it is that it works! :wink: And, in regards to other people who ask me how other people are doing -- that still irks me. :lol: I feel like: "If you really care and you want to know -- go ask THEM, why are you asking me?" I try to be polite and say that to them -- but, I'm still working on it. :lol: I often think the reason they ask me about someone else -- when they haven't taken the time to ask the other person, is: they're just trying to show me that they are a caring person.

KB, I totally identify w/ you, in regards to helping my own family members. It's not worked for me once. Old-timers tried to explain this to me when I was new -- but, of course, back then, I didn't believe anything they tried to explain to me. :lol: I had to learn by bumping my head, scrapping my nose, and getting my knees bloody. :lol: I'm MOST grateful, that I finally learned to listen to the experience of others. :wink:
Dallas
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Postby Dallas » Wed Aug 03, 2011 1:43 am

btw: My sons seem to do better when I don't talk w/ them about their drinking or using problems, other than to say something like "I understand. It used to be that way for me, too." :wink:
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Postby ~Jools~ » Wed Aug 03, 2011 12:47 pm

Dallas wrote:btw: My sons seem to do better when I don't talk w/ them about their drinking or using problems, other than to say something like "I understand. It used to be that way for me, too." :wink:


I like this
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Step 3

Postby Toast » Thu Aug 04, 2011 2:31 pm

Hi, for me this step means i'm no longer alone so i dont have to fix anyone or anything but myself. Taking this step was the 1st time in my life i knew i was on the right bus and it didnt matter who was driving, we were gonna get there regardless!
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Postby dimples12562 » Thu Feb 23, 2012 10:08 am

~Jools~ wrote:
Dallas wrote:btw: My sons seem to do better when I don't talk w/ them about their drinking or using problems, other than to say something like "I understand. It used to be that way for me, too." :wink:


I like this


Me too!! Great way to respond (connect)

Lotta good stuff in here! Thanks all for sharing!!
~P
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Postby Dallas » Thu Feb 23, 2012 10:22 am

Thanks for sharing dimples! And, Happy Thursday to you!
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Postby Camel » Fri Feb 24, 2012 3:36 pm

When I see someone struggling with alcohol, family or not, I am obligated, as I was told, to tell that person, "There's a better way of life." Some have told me to mind my own business, some have been profanely offensive, some have only grunted, but a few have asked, "What the hell are you talking about?" One of 'em just celebrated 6 years of sobriety.


Hub
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Postby dimples12562 » Fri Feb 24, 2012 3:56 pm

Camel wrote:When I see someone struggling with alcohol, family or not, I am obligated, as I was told, to tell that person, "There's a better way of life." Some have told me to mind my own business, some have been profanely offensive, some have only grunted, but a few have asked, "What the hell are you talking about?" One of 'em just celebrated 6 years of sobriety.


Hub


:D thats GOOD stuff!!
~P
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