Alcoholics Anonymous AA Big Book Study and Discussion.
ROBERT wrote:WOW---what some great stuff- 'round here I appreciate what the postings do for me and add to my understanding of my thinking--- I feel very confident that my past is exactly as it was supposed to be---NO MISTAKES, ONLY LESSONS! my attitude that "I" screwed things up validated my need for power in my life, a feeling of I'm in control--today my outlook has been transformed. It seems to me that the power greater than all of us, in my opinion, could have very well been running the show all along in my life--yea choices were made, consequences came about, thats life- but to believe "I" screwed things up is giving my ego ammunition---and creating a poor self-image, either of which, this alki-feels better not allowing in! I make choices and if my self-image is not healthy my choices may not be either, so this is part of "More will be revealed" for me-- to learn how this illness operates in my thinking and what i do have controll over is my thinking--MY CHOICE-POSITVE SELF TALK OR NEGATIVE SELF TALK! At times this is a difficut task! It is easier to give into the old ideas, they are comfotable, yet self defeating, so it takes help from my H.P.( I ask for help) THEN-- the evidence of willingness to change is ACTION, and I need a clear idea of what I want out of being sober- this also requires ACTION---like setting goals. Just saying I want to be happy is too ambiguous, I need to be more definite---on whats important to me. Once I have a clearly defined goal, or aspiration for my life be it spiritual-physical or mental I MUST HAVE ACTION,or the ideas of a better life are just grandiose intentions- The sky is the limit here- the proper use of the will- we can use this all we want- what does that say? Ask your self what that means to you--what we want we can have if we are using our will properly-It says the spiritual realm is broad and roomy- sounds like endless possibilities to me, all inclusive, --- sounds huge to me--So I will get what I get either by, ACTION or INACTION- my choice and yours too...BE WELL
Thank you so much for the remark of No Mistakes- Only Lessons. I tend to beat my self up all the time if I did not do the next right thing, or even over simple things. Your quote: I feel very confident that my past is exactly as it was supposed to be---NO MISTAKES, ONLY LESSONS! my attitude that "I" screwed things up validated my need for power in my life, a feeling of I'm in control--today my outlook has been transformed. My sponsor gave me a token for my 2 months chip last month that states "Change your attitude, change your world" You stating that your attitude of I screwed things up validated my need for power in life. Oh how that helped me to see that this is what I do. My sponsor has had me start a list of things I can control and things I can not. Have not done such a good job on that. And hearing that my thoughts and actions are what I can learn to better control in healthy ways is wonderful for my growth. I have been reading a book on Positive Affirmations, and through the meetings keep hearing the word I am human. So, I am learning to use the saying Easy Does It and apply that to myself, it does take alot of negative energy to beat myself up all the time. It takes much less energy to get honest with myself, realize I am human and learn from my mistake, thoughts and actions. I heard in a meeting the other day something that I re-vamped for myself. "Todays thoughts and re-actions are tomorrow's past." For some reason it helps me to better apply the way I think and react to today so that I do not have a major list of ammends to make later down the road, or beat myself up so much.
Thanks so much for your insight and strength. I truly can not express how much I love this website already.
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