Love is ineffable! Yes! That is what love is... it is something that you cannot put in words. (that's my intellectual understanding, mind you - for what it's worth!
I am in a relationship with a fine man. He does not try to control, change me. I know that this is not 'perfect' love, but it's great! He is my teacher in many respects, but I find myself shocked at times when I discover he has (ACK!) clay feet! (so to speak folks
At times I still find myself attracted to what could be bad for me. I know this is not acting within the integrity that the program offers me. So, I recognize this as a red flag now. I believe that if I have made a commitment, that I should keep it, and that is the integrity of this program. Maybe we are not married, but we do have a commitment to being true to each other. I do not feel guilty at 'looking,' but I do, at being unduly attracted to another and trying to hold on to the fantasy.
So, I believe we are given people, who supply us with ample opportunity to grow and become more fully ourselves and who we are meant to be. My b/f is a truly sweet person, who touches me deeply when he doesn't even realize it. For example, he balances his checkbook every (or almost every night)... and I don't even look at mine! Okay, I realize it takes different things to touch different people!
And then, there is my daughter - bless her soul! We are so much alike, that it astounds me, but she is also so different, and that is what interests me.
I believe love, ineffable that I believe it to be, supplies us with what we need to enact our growth and development as human beings, and helps us to forgive ourselves for what previously seems unforgivable. It brings life to our lives, and endows us with a sense of humility previously unavailable due to our egos.
That is MY limited understanding, but I am hoping that I may be open to growing and understanding. Thanks folks for letting me share.