Welcome and keep coming back. All this stuff works out. I too am like Wareagle....but it doesn't matter. I find myself closest to a higher power through other people.....when I isolate from them is when I get that feeling of being abandonded or not connected....I think everyone of us finds a balance on what works and what doesn't. I personally find I still need 3-4 meetings a week minimunm.
A funny thing is I have been to many "Agnostic" meetings and find a lot of spirituality there... I still fluctuate between believing and using the group. Finding through our willingness to seek is what matters.
I hope you get to stay.....