- Practicing Step Ten – For Practical Purposes!

Practicing Step Ten – For Practical Purposes!




12 Steps: Discussions related to the 12 Steps and using them as a treatment to recover from alcohol and drug addiction.

Practicing Step Ten – For Practical Purposes!

Postby Dallas » Wed May 30, 2007 11:37 am

Practicing Step Ten – For Practical Purposes!

Is Step 10 – a misunderstood Step?


[b]Step 10 “Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted itâ€
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Postby garden variety » Wed May 30, 2007 3:38 pm

Hi Dallas!

I think your right about step 10. I look at that one the way I do step 3. Let me tell you why.

Like it said in the in the book for step three I had to find a Power by which I could live and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. So I do that third step every day.

Now the book also says that this continuing to take personal inventory is a "lifelong process" or something to that nature. Well heres that thinking thing I sometimes do again. Last time I looked - I was living each day one day at a time. So if that step ten inventory is going to be a lifelong process - that means I have to do it each and every day that Im living - namely today.

Like I told you before I started writing questions to ask myself if I did this or that at the end of the day. But I also ask what are the things that I do that pleases God as I understand Him and not only the things I do wrong. I think thats in line with what you posted. As long as my will and my life are "in Gods care" then He will make me do a "spot check" like you said when something isnt feeling right or like you said "getting disturbed". But I already know that if Im getting disturbed its on account of me and nobody else cause the book also tells me that. It says my problems are basically of my own doing.

This is how it works for me. If it isnt real clear if Im wrong and need to promptly admit - that nagging feeling will push me to pray and "seek closer conscious contact" with my Higher Power which is my step 11. But in order for me to get that closer conscious contact from step 11 - then Im forced to do step 10 because it needs to be done before step 11. So thats how them spot checks show up for me.

But I also need to look at the good things I do while Im "in Gods care" too. I think the book says that when I do my step 4 inventory Im like a businessman that is taking stock of my goods - getting rid of the bad things that I cant sell - but also using the good things that I can. So if the inventory for step 4 is for both good and bad "stock" inside me - then the step 10 inventory has to be the same way because its a inventory too. There are sometimes that I realize shortly after I do something good that it was the right thing and it makes me smile because God did for me what I know I couldnt do. But most the time the good things come up when I ask them questions for step 10 at the end of the day.
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Postby Dallas » Fri Oct 05, 2007 8:52 am

I just noticed -- that I was to continue writing on this topic. :oops:
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Postby DebbieV » Sat Oct 06, 2007 9:47 am

I am taking a new girl through her steps, and, that is causing me to take a closer look at them than I did before.

So, I was thinking about step 4, and how I hear some people go back and do a 4th step once a year or so.......What I am wondering is why?

1. We admitted
2. Came to believe
3. Made a decision
4. Made a inventory
5. Admitted our wrongs
6. Ready to have God remove our defects
7. Ask Him to remove our shortcomings
8. Made a list of wrongs to others
9. Made amends
10. Continued to take inventory and admit our wrongs
11. Sought to improve our conscious contact with God
12. Work with others

OK, I know I shortened the step (pg 60-61 in BB for full version)

If we do what step 10 says, and what Dallas has so well laid out above. We Openly, Honestly, and Willingly:
Do a person inventory.
Set right any new mistakes as we go along.
As we are cleaning up the past.
Watching for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear.
Asking God at once to remove them.
Make amends quickly.

If we do all of that in 10, every day. At the end of the year, or 6 months----some people say they do another 4th every 6 months to a year----Why do we need to go back and do a 4th? Haven't we been keeping our house in order in 10 and 11? Like Paul mentioned above, and I agree as well, 10 is a step I do everyday. And like Dallas mentioned above, I do it all day long. (as long as I keep in fit spiritual condition). So what is left to do in a 4th step?

This is not a argument, I really dont get it. Am I missing something, or is it that just everyone has a different interpretation of 10 and 11?

Thanks for letting me share.
Debbie
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Postby Dallas » Sat Oct 06, 2007 10:39 am

Our life ... is kind of like a garden.
We are the Gardener.

It we're letting our garden get full of weeds -- we'll have a weed garden.
It doesn't take any extra work to have a weed garden. Anyone can have a weed garden. Just neglect the garden and weeds will automatically grow.

Steps 10 & 11, is like the planting, pruning, weeding, watering and doing the other things that need to be done to have and to kee a nice garden.

In Step 4-9, we were preparing the soil for planting.

In Steps 10, 11, 12, we do our planting and growing and maintaining.

If we're not watching what we are planting, maintaining and allowing to grow... the garden will become unmanageable and full of weeds.

It takes time and effort to get a nice garden. It takes time and effort to get a nice life.

It takes disciplined daily time and effort to keep a nice garden and to keep a nice life.
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Postby DebbieV » Sat Oct 06, 2007 10:49 am

DALLAS WROTE:
If we're not watching what we are planting, maintaining and allowing to grow... the garden will become unmanageable and full of weeds.

It takes time and effort to get a nice garden. It takes time and effort to get a nice life.

It takes disciplined daily time and effort to keep a nice garden and to keep a nice life.


I like the way you put that Dallas, I can understand the garden. However, what is we are watching what we are growing? What if we are pulling the weeds as we go along? Is that not what we should be doing? Is that not what I should be passing on when I talk about steps 10 and 11?

Really am confused on this one. My sponsor helped a little, but she has the same belief that I do. If you have done your 4th and do 10&11 everyday, you dont need to go back and do a 4th. :?

Debbie
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Postby Dallas » Sat Oct 06, 2007 11:14 am

My sponsor helped a little, but she has the same belief that I do. If you have done your 4th and do 10&11 everyday, you dont need to go back and do a 4th.


There isn't anything confusing about that. :lol:
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Postby DebbieV » Sun Oct 07, 2007 11:59 am

Thanks Dallas.

Your right...fair enough. :D

Do you always have to be right?
Must be a terrible burden for you to carry around. :wink:

I am glad you are here, sometimes I need to read and put in my mind, exactly what you write.....it keeps me in the book. :D

Debbie
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Postby Dallas » Sun Oct 07, 2007 12:40 pm

Once upon a time -- I used to walk on water, too!

But, then, I moved to warmer weather... where the water didn't freeze. So, I gave up on the water-walking. :lol:
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Postby anniemac » Mon Oct 08, 2007 10:47 am

Debbie,

These are my thoughts and my experience. When I did my (first) 4th Step, I was only sober a few months. My thinking and my memory were both still quite muddled. The 4th Step that I did was as thorough and honest as I was able to do, at that point in time.

To me, and maybe others don't look at it this way, but to me, the 10th Step is, in part, to clear up new things that come up on a daily basis. However, at other times, something big and old rumbles around under the surface for a while and I'm not even sure what it is, until one day I get this realization that I need to look at something more closely.

For instance, a few months ago, I was a little irritated at my husband, and he (unknowingly) made an expression that reminded me so very much of his father. At that paticular moment, I felt exceptionally poorly toward my husband and realized it was out of proportion to what he had done to irritate me to begin with. Then I realized - it was his resemblance to my father in law that was sticking in my craw.

My father in law was not on my first 4th Step list. We rarely saw him, and although I really did not him at all, I didn't feel that I harbored any resentments toward him. Well, this situation showed me that there is a deep, old dislike and resentment of him (although he had already passed away) and that I needed to take a look at this.

Under the "more will be revealed" category, I found this to be pretty old and pretty big. So the best way for me to go at it was with the columns used in the 4th Step.

Maybe technically it's called a Tenth Step, but since I put pen to paper and use the columns, I call it another 4th Step.

I can only know what I know at any given point in time, and when more is revealed, sometimes it's helpful for me to revisit other Steps in more detail with a different situation in mind.

That's what works for me.
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