Ongoing problems with people close to you?

[918gma]

My internet crashed for several days and I am way behind on evry thing. It feels good to be back.

As far as the ex goes, he passed away a short while after the kids moved in with him. Believe it or not I greived. It was quite a shock. Of course being sober, I acttually went through the process normally with the help of my sponsor. It really gave me a sense of closure.

Barb, my prego has her baby. He is beutiful. He has a birth defect wich has kept him in the hospital. He has had one surgury and will be requiring more. It has been very painful to sit back and watch my daughter go through some of the same experiences I have gone through with my other daughter. Especially trying to do it right and stay out of God's way and let him teach her.

It has been an interesting couple of weeks that has kept me to my paces. Trying to be of service to my family but not enabling them. I hate growth. It hurts. Thank God for the program I would have never survived this time with out it.

I am officially a sponsor now as well. That has really helped me stay grounded and out my own selfishness. I can't vent, I have to be an example of how the program works. No more whining, except to my sponsor, who just laughs at me any way.

Any way I have missed you guys, and am glad to be back on line.

[crickit]

Glad to see you back Cathy. You sure have had a lot on your plate. I understand the mixed feelings about you X. He is the father of your children and was a part of your life. Of course you are going to grieve. My aunt was seperated from her husband for 15 years when he died and she said the same thing. It gave her some kind of closure. I have a very good relationship with my 1st x, the father of my children and I know it would be very hard for me if something were to happen to him.

I'm sorry to hear about the new baby. I guess you know first hand how difficult that can be. But on the brighter side, you will be able to offer your support in a way that others can't. You've been there.

And you're a sponsor now. Great news. Helping others has always been easier than helping ourselves but now, by helping others, it helps us. But remember, we all need to vent. So feel free to 'whine' to me privately any time LOL. Progress not Perfection !!!

HAPPY 24 HOURS
Crickit

[blueangel]

I had forgotten to leave a couple things off my 4th step list. The first was the french people. Having had to work very close to the french media in the 1980's, the majority of which were men, that were rude and very nonchalant about grabbing women almost to the point of abusiveness. I was kidnapped a few years ago by a cajan and with a gun at my back was used as mule for his drug deal. hmmmm, how could I possibly forgive these 2 classes of people, and see where my fault may have been?
Interestingly enough we had a hurricane which brought a couple of my worst fears literally into my back yard. But in overlooking all of my own fears, and reaching out a hand to 10,000 people in a desperate time, I became able to realize what unconditional love was all about. I forgot all about my personal well being as I hugged these people and listened very carefully to them and got them whatever help I could. I may be only one person, but I realized that God gave me the right to carry a cell phone for them to reunite their families and recover their lives. I do not own this cell phone, car, or home, I am only given the priveledge of using them when used for good purposes and paying the bill on them, and shall be able to continue to use them as long as I use them to HELP others.
Interestingly also was the fact that God had to break my body in order to help others whenever and wherever they had needs greater than mine, because I have very few needs and they are getting smaller by the minute. God Bless you all and have a blessed day, Kay