A paraphrased example of how to apply the 12 Steps on a different kind of problem:
Step 1: I'm powerless over the way that I feel -- my emotions have become unmanageable.
I'm powerless over (name), his/her (describe what they are doing) -- my emotions have become unmanageable over my obsession to control this person or the situation.
Step 2: Came to believe that God, through the 12 Steps will restore me to sanity and emotional sobriety.
Step 3: Made a decision to turn my will and my life over to the care and direction of God -- by using the 12 Steps on my problem
My "will" has been my desire to control my emotions, and/or (... name of the person, principle or institution that has us disturbed .......), and/or (.....the experience or situation -- of the person, principle or institution that has us disturbed ........).
My "life" is the actions that I have been taking to try to control "getting what I want -- when I want it" which is the other person and/or (.....the experience or situation -- of the person, principle or institution that has us disturbed ........). WHEN I think he should be sober.
Step 4: Made a fearless and searching inventory of my resentments and fears about (the name of the person, principle, institution, situation or circumstances) -- and the harms that I could be causing him and myself and others -- with my obsession and efforts to control (....the situation, circumstance, person, principle or institution...) !
Step 5: Call someone (other than the person or institution thatâ€™s got you all nerved up) and talk about it.... (Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another person, the exact nature of our wrongs).
Step 6: Become entirely willing to stop doing it â€“ and allow God to remove the obsession.
Step 7: Ask God to remove the obsession and help you to stop doing it.
Step 8: Made a list of all who were harmed by the obsession.
Step 9: Made direct amends to those who were harmed by the obsession.
Step 10: Continued to take inventory and promptly admit it -- when I discover that I'm doing it again.
Step 11: Sought through prayer and meditation (quiet time) praying only for the knowledge of Gods will for me (not God's will for someone or something else) and the power to carry out God's will for me (not the power to carry out God's will for someone or something else).
Step 12: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of this course of action -- I continued to practice this course of action in all my affairs and all my problems -- and I will help others who are emotionally disturbed, by sharing my experience with this situation -- and the relief that I discovered by taking these Steps.