anniemac wrote:2. Any idea why Sex is even brought up in the BB as a separate area?
1. I don't question "why" -- I just do it.
2. Sex conduct -- conduct for me, means "something I did" -- not "something I thought I did" -- if conduct = thoughts, I would have been rich a long time ago!
People who get in trouble for their insanity -- do not get in trouble because of the thoughts they think -- it's because of the insane actions that they take (insane conduct).
3. Sex conduct is there as a separate issue because "many of us needed an overhauling" in this aspect of our lives, too. And, it seems to cause so many problems for us (like resentments and fear -- which are also brought up as separate areas that we are to deal with in the Inventory).
4. The realization -- is not just how selfish sex conduct can harm someone else -- but also in how it harms ourselves.
5. Sex -- like fear and resentment -- deal with the most powerful instincts that we have -- and can produce the most perplexing problems and conflicts that we have to deal with -- to remain sober and happy.
6. If we get "unhappy" -- and stay that way -- we'll drink again.
7. Our ideas about sex -- can be just like our toxic ideas about God and religion. We're trying to live up to someone else's play-book -- and we keep making all the wrong moves -- according to their book.
The emphasis seems to be: that whatever our ideals become -- that we ask God to help us to mold them. And, if it's important that we - "have a God as we understand Him" -- then, this can easily be as different for each individual -- as it is different to have a different understanding about God.
Therefore: The bottomline -- it is suggested that we not be the arbiter of anyone's sex conduct -- just like we are not to be the arbiter of their Higher Power as they understand it. It means: What the other person does is their business and none of our business. It means: (to me) that I don't even want to talk with them about it -- because it's none of my business what their sex ideals are.
The focus here is for me to "have my own ideals about sex." And, if I do that -- and I live up to those ideals (as long as I'm not harming others) -- then, sex will not be a problem for me -- whether I'm having the salted variety, the peppered variety, whether I'm doing it a lot, or not doing it at all.
Note: If I had to write an inventory for all the sex I've thought about -- I'd spend the rest of my life writing my 4th -- and would never be able to get to a 5th on it!