Here's two more:
The doctor told his patient that he had 10 days to live unless he quit drinking.
The man said, "Isn't there anything else I can do besides quit drinking?"
The doc said., "Well, you could go down to the beauty parlor & get a mud pack every day."
The man said, "Really? Will it help?"
The doc replied, "No, but it'll get you used to dirt."
A cop pulled over a guy & said, "Your eyes are awfully red. Have you been drinking?"
"Gee officer," the man said, "Your eyes are awfully glazed. Have you been eating donuts?"
