COMFORT-vs- CHARACTER

[ROBERT]

AT TIMES, DOING THE NEXT RIGHT THING ISN'T A SIMPLE,INTUITIVE CHOICE! I AM GENERALLY AWARE OF THE OPTIONS, AND FOR THE MOST PART THE APPROPRIATE ONE IS MADE--INTUITIVELY, THANKS TO THE PROGRAM OF RECOVERY--THE 12 STEPS--THEN THERE ARE THE TIMES WHEN I STRUGGLE W/CHARACTER-vs-COMFORT,AS WE ALL DO(I AM ASSUMING) SO I BROUGHT THIS UP @ A MEETING--INTERESTING TO HEAR WHAT OTHERS THINK ABOUT THIS TOPIC---ANY EXPERIENCE,STRENGHT,& HOPE ANY ONE?.......ROBERT

[GeoffS]

Not quite sure what you mean?

If you are talking about justifying holding on to character defects by calling them 'taking our comforts' then I'd refer you to the 3rd step and the 7th step prayer.

Perhaps you could share a bit more and help us with what sounds like a really interesting topic.

[ROBERT]

IN THE 12&12,THERE IS PLENTY OF INFO. ABOUT THIS SUBJECT AND IT IS IN STEP SEVEN--MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE HAS BEEN STRUGGLING W/BEING TOTALLY-100% HONEST @WORK W/OTHERS.I'M IN SALES AND THE FEAR THAT I MAY NOT CLOSE A SALE IS A PROBLEM I'M NOT YET READY TO LET GO OF --I DO PRAY FOR WILLINGNESS AS I WANT TO DEVELOP MORE PESONAL INTEGRITY-SO I KEEP MOVING FORWARD,SLOWLY-BUT FORWARDS...........ROBERT

[sunlight]

Hi Robert,
What came to mind when I read your post was the line from the book, "the sense of ease and COMFORT which comes at once by taking a few drinks."

I work in a field that requires rigorous honesty - banking. I have seen much of the opposite, not only with money, but with juggling figures and finding ways around government regulations. And, I did my share of it too, when I was still spiritually asleep.

A while ago I took in a counterfeit $100 bill from a bar and didn't notice it at the time, as I was chatting with the bar owner & keeping an eye on his two children who were tearing up the place. Later I saw it was fake. But technically, you have to confront the presenter with it at the time, otherwise he could say it wasn't his.

I could have tried to hide it, but the thought made me sick. Just like the thought of taking a few drinks! (FEW! My eye! )
I called him, taking the chance that he'd deny it was his & I'd have to take the loss.

But, I could not be happy, joyous & free living a lie.

He just said he gets them all the time cuz the bar is so dark & to just deduct it from his account.

The point is - when I do what I believe is God's will for me, it comes out all right. Even if I had to take the loss it would have been all right - after all, I deserved it for not paying attention!

But it's not all right for me to be dishonest.

And, it creates more fear, rationalization, drama & grief than being truthful.

And, I bet the four horsemen are in there somewhere! Who wants to deal with THOSE perverts?

Keep on steps 6 & 7. That's where I found serenity today.

Love, sunlight

[DiggerinVA]

I worked in sales for 15 years. This was before the cravings hit. But something I learned was being honest was the way for me. I had customers who would wait to talk to me and buy only from me. Truly it works best in all our affairs.

[ROBERT]

THANKS PEOPLE---THIS IS A NEAT DEAL,TO BE ABLE TO DISCUSS OUR STUFF W/O FEELINGS OF BEING JUDGED--YA KNOW I DO FIND @ TIMES SOME DRY PEOPLE @ MEETINGS (ASSUMING) ARE LESS THAN DIPLOMATIC ON THESE ISSUES AND I'M ABLE TO DEVELOPE HEALTHIER BOUNDRIES AS A RESULT--AS FAR AS THE SUBJECT @ HAND--PROGRESS THRU ENCOURAGMENT FROM OTHERS BY SHARING THIS STUFF WORKS FOR ME.SOME OF THESE CHARACTURE DEFECTS ARE DUG IN DEEP BUT THRU "NOTHING SHORT OF CONTINUOUS ACTION UPON THESE(12 STEPS) AS A WAY OF LIFE CAN BRING>(IMPORTANT WORD HERE) THE MUCH DESIRED RESULT"--TOP OF PG 40-12&12--WHAT A COOL DEAL TO HAVE ALL THESE WONDERFULL CHOICES AVAILABLE TO US TODAY-(SANITY)--SEEMS TO ME ALCOHOLISM IS THE ONLY PRISON WHERE THE KEY TO FREEDOM IS INSIDE US-HAS BEEN ALL ALONG-AND ALWAYS WILL BE.I'M FEELING VERY BLESSED-FREE-JOYOUS-HAPPY.THANKS

[Dallas]

Hey Sunlight, DiggerinVA, and Robert...
Thanks for your messages.

I discovered in my own experiences that some changes came rapidly -- and other changes were slow and difficult -- and I wasn't willing to make the difficult changes until they became too painful or threatening to me.

Who of us, really wants to give up something that seems to be working well for us -- in the moment?

Heck. If I could have kept drinking -- I would of kept drinking. I loved drinking. It did great things for me that I couldn't do for myself... But, then I became alcoholic -- so I had to stop drinking. And, that was far from easy!

Dallas

[ROBERT]

YEA-- IT'S EASIER STAYING SOBER-THAN GETTING SOBER!!!!--I DON'T WANT TO FORGET THAT,GETTING SOBER WAS HORRIBLE, & NO MATTER HOW DIFFICULT LIFE MAY <<APPEAR>>-THERE IS THE REALITY,THAT WAS MY LIFE @ ONE TIME-WHICH WAS...WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.....SO THANK YOU GUYS FOR HELPING ME "NOT REGRET THE PAST NOR WISH TO SHUT THE DOOR ON IT"..........ROBERT......PS. WOW NOW I'M REALLY LOOKING FORWARDS TO GIVING A FELLOW SUFFERER,HIS ################################### DAY CHIP TONIGHT!!!

[GeoffS]

WHAT A COOL DEAL TO HAVE ALL THESE WONDERFULL CHOICES AVAILABLE TO US TODAY-(SANITY)

That's an important thing for me to note today. When I was drinking I had no choices. Today life has opened up and I am faced with many choices and options, some easy some hard. Thankfully I choose the help of a Higher Power and a sponsor to help me make fewer stupid ones!

[ROBERT]

YOU KNOW MY SPONSER SAID TO ME JUST THE OTHER DAY--"DON'T TAKE YOURSELF SO SERIOUS" AN ATTITUDE--WHICH HAS BEEN A PAINFULL ONE TO "COME TO" UNDERSTAND -- AND AS I GROW IN UNDERSTANDING AND EFFECTIVNESS THRU-- 10,11,& 12, I BEGIN TO SEE THERE ARE NO "STUPID" MISTAKES,AS I SEE IT THERE AREN'T ANY MISTAKES, JUST LESSONS-I AM A STUDENT IN LIFE AND LIFE IS MY TEACHER SO WHAT IF I NEW THE ANSWERES ALREADY - WHAT WOULD THAT MEAN-SO I JUST FORGIVE & APOLOGIZE!! AND KEEP LIVING--FINALLY---LIVING. I AM TRUELY GREATFULL FOR ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS