BatonRouge wrote:But it seems that I am just unable to internalize the fact that I cannot manage my own life!
BatonRouge wrote:I still play the victim, and how self-pity is my worst character defect."
BatonRouge wrote:When I started this topic I should have wrote "Sponsee problems" instead of sponsor problems
BatonRouge wrote:Anyway, I told my sponsor what had happened the following day, and got my butt chewed up and down. I belive he used the words, "Predator" "And worse than malestng a child" In fact he yelled and freaked out like he usually does when I have screwed up in the past. He gets really emotional, tends to beat me down to a moldable level. Then gets real tender and understanding. You know when you beat a dog, then pet it hoping you make it feel better. Similar, just with no physical abuse.
sunlight wrote:My 1st sponsor was very hardcore & when I was 13th stepped at 4 mos. sober she freaked out & said I would drink again. I was determined to prove her wrong & held back just how involved I was,then started to not reveal other things cuz she "wouldn't understand". I wasn't drinking so I thought I was well. I was insane & this man almost killed me & by the grace of God I escaped with my life.
My sponsor said she couldn't help me anymore - my mind was too shut. I was led to a new sponsor who had the same experience in sobriety. I was able to see that I was trapped in the same way that alcohol had trapped me & I was powerless. But she was much more easygoing & kinder & I was able to be honest with her. Ask God for guidance.
I heard that alcoholism is a disease of perception & distraction. Please don't distract yourself or this lady from your primary purpose!
garden variety wrote:First of all, when I am asked to mentor or sponsor someone, I look at this from the view of the Second Tradition. In particular, as a sponsor or mentor, I'm definitely in the position of "trusted servant". It doesn't matter if my protege' lies to me - before I speak to him, I have to remind myself that this is human being that God loves, and I am only there to extend the helping hand of AA. I always - and I mean ALWAYS - understand the way to treat another human being was said like this, by some carpenter fellow. I want to stress here that I'm saying this in the context of the univeral spiritual principles that are in the 12 steps:
"Verily I say to you, insomuch as ye have done to one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done unto me"
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