- isolation

isolation




Experiences along the way that bring us closer to our Higher Power

isolation

Postby ccs » Tue Mar 24, 2009 2:01 pm

this comes from Michael Z I get an e-mail from him once a week and this is definately a moment of clarity for me Queen of Isolation!!
I just wanted to share it here with you all
Luv-2-All Cessie

"The problem with isolating is that you get such bad advice."



By the end of my drinking and using, I was all alone. Unlike some of the stories I hear about people drinking in bars, I preferred to drink alone in my home, and after months of listening to my own best thinking I had run out of options and was at the end of my rope. By some miracle, I was able to reach out, and my journey in recovery began.

While I have worked the steps several times over the years, and worked hard to turn my character defects over to God, I still find that my default mode is to isolate. And when I do, I am cut off from others and from my Higher Power and that's when my best thinking starts again. I've learned that it never has anything good to say.

Today I do the things I learned to do early in sobriety to keep from isolating: I have a sponsor; I get commitments at meetings, and I say yes when asked to participate. In other words, I continue to take contrary action because, as they say, "An alcoholic's best thinking treats loneliness with isolating."

And when I'm isolating, the advice I get is all bad.


___________________________________
ccs
 
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Postby sunlight » Tue Mar 24, 2009 11:17 pm

My sponsor's favorite saying is, "Alcoholics treat loneliness with isolation" !!

I didn't drink in bars either: mostly at home. But, I really like people, so I'd often force myself to go out to friend's houses or parties or wherever & try to control my drinking. Guess how THAT worked! :lol: It was hard for me to communicate with, or relate to people when I was drunk & then my feelings would get hurt & I'd go home & "drink at them" to oblivion.

When I read the part in the book that we know loneliness such as few do, I cried. That was me. Everyone else seemed so connected & I was lost in space. What was wrong with me? I couldn't fix the problem cuz I didn't know what it was. :?

Once I got into the steps I saw that I wasn't connected to me, to others or to a Higher Power. I was just...gone. But, I was assured that there was a solution, so might as well go for it. I didn't have anything to lose, cuz I was already lost.

I still marvel to this day that the book is right! That everything it says is true about this program of recovery, & that it works! :D Hope I never stop marveling.

When I start isolating myself from meetings or other alcoholics, it can become a habit, like anything else I'm doing or not doing. This is not a safe place for me to be cuz then I'm in my head again. One of the first things I heard at a meeting was, "Your mind is like a bad neighborhood - you don't want to go there alone!"

I still like parties & picnics & dances & all the social fun, but working with others is the very best way for me to avoid isolation. If I'm throwing out a rope to a drowning person, I have to BE at the other end of that rope! And not just with wise words & pious platitudes - they need real experience, strength & hope. Real understanding. Real recovery. A real solution that I'm living.
Being approachable, available & accountable keeps me connected in a way nothing else does.

Love you, Cess :wink:
sunlight
 
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Postby Victor » Sun Apr 05, 2009 4:12 pm

Thank you Cess i am a isolationist/loner and constantly have to work to keep out of myself or else...

Thank you Sunlight i always get sooo much from your wisdom :D

peace
vic
Victor
 
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Postby Jools » Sun Apr 05, 2009 8:52 pm

Thanx for sharing this Cessie! I sure am getting a dose of "what I need" tonight.

*waving @ Vic* Good to see ya, I've missed seeing you 'round these parts.

Sun, you're da bomb..have I said that b4? ;)
Jools
 
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